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  • me.

  • Hi again.

  • I'm Jimmy the host.

  • The show.

  • Greetings to those of you who joined me earlier tonight on who wants to be a millionaire.

  • Thank you for watching that.

  • We're beaming to you from my house, which is where I spend every minute of my life.

  • Now my closest friends air my pillows.

  • If nothing else, this experience of being cooped up has taught me that I would never survive face.

  • Three days into the mission, I'd be in the escape pod trying to find a Costco on the moon.

  • This is a big day for the planet.

  • By the way, today is birthday.

  • Today is the 50th and final Earth Day.

  • Now, like not long after midnight last night, we got hit with an earthquake.

  • I was in bed there, got up early and woke everyone up like a five year old on her birthday.

  • Today I will say that was scary because the epicenter was close by.

  • It was in town, but it was kind of refreshing toe worry about being killed by something else for a change.

  • Donald Trump celebrated Earth Day today with a shovel.

  • The president, the first lady, and Mike and Karen pence gathered on the South Lawn to dig a hole, bury his hair in look at how natural they are doing physical labor in their suits and heels.

  • Well, honey is praying right now.

  • They don't dig too close to her escape tunnel.

  • So at the planning, the second lady, Karen Pence, was asked to say a few words.

  • And it was refreshing because finally, someone in this administration is speaking truth while this tree makes the Earth better and stronger.

  • We talked a lot about mental health, and that's an issue that I know.

  • The first lady has been dealing with her whole time that she's been first lady boy as she she has been dealing with it the whole time since she said, I do.

  • This is, um, not great news.

  • The director of the Center for Disease Control, Dr Robert Redfield, says there could be a second wave of the virus later this year that might be worse than this one, because it would coincide with flu season.

  • It could stretch.

  • Our medical resource is even thinner than they already are.

  • Basically, he said.

  • The next version of the virus could be like the Matrix Reloaded just a popular but worse good news is, Well, there is no good news, and we're getting mixed messages from our government.

  • Most experts say, Stay in your home.

  • But our president says Go get a tattoo in a bus station.

  • And that has given rise to stay at home protests around the country, even though the CDC has been very clear, saying Americans should avoid gatherings of any kind.

  • The guy in charge of them seems to think they're totally fine.

  • People want to get back to work.

  • And I've watched some of the protests not in great detail, but I seen that.

  • And they're separated there, a lot of space in between.

  • And then they watching, believe it or not, social doing, social distancing if you can believe it and they are and they're protesting.

  • But that there, uh, groups I've seen have been very much spread out.

  • Sure.

  • Look at how very much spread out these protesters in Raleigh.

  • Where yesterday.

  • Thank you, Mom.

  • Stop yelling.

  • You're embarrassing us.

  • Do not tell me not to yell you ungrateful little.

  • You think these fireworks are going to sell out of the trunk of the car themselves, but as ridiculous as this president is, he's not alone.

  • He got a run for his money today from the mayor of Las Vegas.

  • Who, well, let's put it this way.

  • R.

  • Kelly was watching this interview and said, This woman is nuts.

  • Mayor Carolyn Goodman revealed her lunacy to Anderson Cooper and the whole country today.

  • She believes that Las Vegas is ready to open the casinos now.

  • But you're encouraging.

  • I mean, hundreds of thousands of people coming there in casinos, smoking, drinking, touching slot machines, breathing circulated air and then returning home to states around America and countries around the world.

  • Doesn't that sound like a virus Petri dish?

  • How is that?

  • It sounds like you're being an alarmist.

  • I'm not have lived a long life.

  • I grew up in the heart of Manhattan.

  • I know what it's like to be with subways and on buses.

  • Don't believe there should be any social distancing.

  • You don't believe that this is believe.

  • There should be.

  • Of course.

  • How do you do that in a casino?

  • That's up to them to figure out, I don't know.

  • In a casino, I don't even own any books.

  • If you watch that back, you can see the moment or Anderson Soul leaves his body.

  • It was a long interview.

  • She went on and she was like the You know, that dizzy neighbor.

  • You try to pretend you don't see when you're pulling into the garage.

  • The gist of what she was saying, Waas, why should we treat this virus any differently from anything else?

  • We've had polio.

  • We've had these.

  • None of those were as infectious in Las Vegas.

  • You don't have people with Ebola on a casino floor.

  • You know what?

  • If you don't know that well yet you do, because if you have a neighbor mind died from West Nile because the swimming pool on the next property was filled with mosquitoes and the people who had abandoned the house left the pool full.

  • Oh, well, then you're right.

  • We should reopen Vegas, reopen the casinos and drain the pools.

  • Somehow, she was elected last year with more than 80% of the vote in Las Vegas, and I can see why Mayor Goodman has a lot of thoughts.

  • And the one thing those thoughts have in common is that none of them make any sense.

  • How do you know until we have a control group.

  • We offered to be a control group Anybody knows anything about statistics knows that.

  • For instance, you have about your offering citizens of Las Vegas to be a control group to see if your theory on social distance Sam Nunn doesn't wrong, absolutely wrong.

  • Don't put words in my mouth.

  • You just said will be a excuse me.

  • But I said Waas.

  • I offered to be a control group and I was told by our statistician, You can't do that.

  • Come on, Anderson.

  • She isn't offering Las Vegas's as a control group.

  • She offered them as a control group, and they told her she can't.

  • It's totally different.

  • Somehow.

  • Las Vegas elected every lady you've ever seen at a Baywatch slot machine to be their mayor.

  • Many, if not most, businesses around the country are shut down right now.

  • But there's one establishment in Bend, Oregon, that refuses to surrender to anything.

  • Not even the Corona virus can stop the last blockbuster on Earth.

  • It's still open the movie rental businesses offering curbside pickup during the pandemic.

  • Customers can call the store ahead of time over a movie and pull right up to the front to grab it soars, General Manager says they'll survive this challenge for the same reasons they've stayed in business all these years because the man in Bend, Oregon, are still horny for Shannon Tweed movies on VHS.

  • Good for Blockbuster.

  • If they can make it, so can we.

  • American companies had to make major adjustments over the past month.

  • Every commercial now seems to be tailored to suit the Corona virus era car companies, restaurant chains.

  • Every business has.

  • Ah, one of these earnest, straightforward, cautiously uplifting adds now to remind customers that their here for us now and always have been this one I thought was particularly effective.

  • Right now we're facing uncertain times.

  • None of us know what challenges lie ahead, but one thing's for sure.

  • Americans stand strong when it's time for us to band together.

  • Way dio.

  • When it's time to lend a hand way, Lend Teoh Americans get the job done with a little boost from Beast Last Power Energy Drink Together we'll meet this crisis and beat it with a blast of the beast.

  • New flavor man glow in the dark way.

  • We're going to take a break, but when we come back, it will be hammer time with the God of Thunder.

me.

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ジミーキンメルの検疫モノローグ - トランプ&ラスベガス市長は誰が狂っているかを競う (Jimmy Kimmel’s Quarantine Monologue – Trump & Vegas Mayor Compete for Who's Crazier)

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    林宜悉 に公開 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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