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  • [The Wonders Of Light By Snow Dept.]

  • The wonders of light got the prettiest sight

  • for everyone to enjoy

  • - Well, hi.

  • Hello.

  • So,

  • today has been

  • a very weird day.

  • You know how there are just some days,

  • when you wake up and you get out of bed,

  • and you feel like you've got out of the wrong bed,

  • and into the wrong room,

  • and everything is wrong.

  • Well that wasn't my day, my day was fine.

  • But I went to wake up Claudia, who was like,

  • "I hate today, I hate life, I hate everything."

  • I was like, "Good! Good start, good start."

  • So it is two days until what would have been

  • Claudia's mother's birthday

  • and so it's always a very difficult time of year.

  • This-

  • This kind of-

  • This week is quite hard for her, understandably.

  • But she tends to take it out on

  • everything around her,

  • and decides she dislikes everything,

  • but really it's just one thing.

  • Anyway, I said, "What would make you feel better?"

  • And she said, "Digging a hole."

  • So,

  • she's digging a hole.

  • Hello.

  • And yesterday I asked what would make her feel better,

  • and she said, "A granddad jumper," so.

  • She now has a granddad jumper.

  • And the dogs are being incredibly annoying.

  • So we took the dogs for a walk.

  • (car door shuts)

  • Ah!

  • - And I got myself.

  • - Way! - It was two for one pound.

  • Well, I bought one and then she was like,

  • "It's two for one pound!"

  • I was like, "Okay!"

  • [The Wonders Of Light By Snow Dept.]

  • Oh it's such a charm

  • Got you up in my arm

  • - And then we went to the garden center.

  • Which, you know, place of dreams.

  • Will never be over

  • - Normally love the garden center.

  • But we were there specifically to buy a spade, so.

  • It's time to get out in the snow

  • (Jessica laughs)

  • - That's new to me.

  • I'm not necessarily a spade shopper normally.

  • Choirs will sing, and the joy bells will ring

  • Nobody loves you as much as I do

  • - And we've been decorating the house

  • and just sort of putting lights up places.

  • The ceiling, it is that time

  • - And I even got to decorate lights

  • round a bush that I really like.

  • Drinking hot wine by the fire

  • Here on our own we've got nothing to fear

  • - Now I'm just going to take Claudia some tea.

  • In the garden.

  • While she digs a hole.

  • (beep)

  • (water boiling)

  • (gentle electronic chime)

  • - Yeah, I did just pour milk everywhere.

  • I told you it's one of those days.

  • (distant bird call)

  • - Thank you.

  • - [Jessica] How's your digging?

  • - Quite hard.

  • It's very sold clay,

  • but that's the whole point of it, mixing it up a bit.

  • Because it's not good enough

  • to grow plants and stuff in yet.

  • - [Jessica] Is the digging making you feel better?

  • - Yeah, and look.

  • I cleaned out leaves with the rake.

  • - [Jessica] Ooh.

  • - We were supposed to go to London today,

  • to see a play called "The Lost Thing."

  • It's supposed to be really good.

  • Royal Oprah house, very fancy.

  • Has a disabled cast and everything.

  • But I just felt too delicate

  • and like I couldn't cope.

  • And so yesterday I just cried to Claudia

  • and was like, "I cannot. I can't."

  • And I know it's really ...

  • "Woo, we should go support it,"

  • and also, "Woo, content."

  • But, um,

  • no. (laughs)

  • Probably better to put my health first.

  • So, I instead went to the corner shop,

  • exciting,

  • and bought myself

  • ... attempts to find it ...

  • Lemsip.

  • The thing that keeps me going throughout winter

  • 'cause I really need it.

  • And Yorkshire tea.

  • Gold.

  • Because it's the only tea that Claudia drinks

  • and shockingly, we're out.

  • But she's decided she's fancy now,

  • so she drinks Yorkshire tea ... Gold.

  • I just watched that back and it's

  • the shakiest thing ever

  • and I really apologize.

  • It's just not -

  • It's just, it's just,

  • just not my day.

  • I'm just not feeling well.

  • (laughs)

  • And then feeling unwell makes me feel ...

  • Feeling unwell makes me feel very

  • emotionally vulnerable.

  • I guess that's not unexpected?

  • Um, it ju-

  • I don't know.

  • Even try- I can't even explain my feelings.

  • Just need a Lemsip.

  • (laughs)

  • I just want to stop sniffing,

  • and also feeling awful.

  • My lungs feel disgusting.

  • I think I get scared as well,

  • which doesn't help.

  • Because I just went through so many winters

  • getting bronchitis over and over and over again.

  • Got pneumonia once too, that was fun.

  • (clicks tongue)

  • Um, but then I had the pneumonia jab,

  • which lasts ten years

  • and has now run out, I'm pretty sure.

  • And I had talked to a GP about it

  • and he said that I'm not in risk of pneumonia, so

  • apparently I don't need one.

  • And I'm like, "Well, I do, because, I still do."

  • Because my intercostal muscles,

  • which are the muscles in between your ribs,

  • mine wasted away when I-

  • Hello, darling.

  • Hi.

  • You're coming for cuddle?

  • Come on then.

  • All right.

  • Hmm. (laughs)

  • Hey.

  • You come to cheer me up?

  • Mine wasted away when I was

  • on bed rest for

  • two years.

  • As you could expect.

  • 'Cause I wasn't doing a lot of breathing.

  • And they've never really, properly grown back?

  • Grown stronger again, I suppose.

  • So I find things like coughing quite difficult,

  • sometimes.

  • If I need to clear my airways,

  • I have to get someone to smack me on the back.

  • And whenever I get ill,

  • if I get a cold or something,

  • it tends to go into my lungs.

  • Which isn't good.

  • And because the doctor wouldn't give me

  • the pneumonia jab, I'm also terrified

  • that I'm gonna get pneumonia.

  • (sighs)

  • But it's fine, isn't it, Tills?

  • It's fine.

  • I'm in like the best health I've been in ten years.

  • So I should calm down, shouldn't I?