私はヒットマン2で新聞で村を丸ごと殺した (I Killed An Entire Village With A Newspaper In Hitman 2)

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Ah, it's another beautiful day.
Top of morning gamers.
Top of morning, everybody.
Top of morning, Mr Man.
Standing next to the thing.
It's me, regular ass man blending in.
Nothing here is different.
Excuse me, lady.
Excuse me.
Okay.
You bumped into me, All right?
You may have a great ass, but you don't have a great attitude.
She's too fast.
I can't capture.
I have been sent out on a very important mission here today.
Charles Blake.
For a better world, it would be a better world.
When I kill him, I have to kill that guy over there on somebody way off in the distance.
Played croquet.
Now, how am I going to do it?
I need to come up with an inventive way of doing it.
I don't want to just rush in and kill people.
Normally, I can't just rush in and shoot them in the face or anything.
That's too normal.
That's too easy.
I need something cooler.
Something better.
Also, I'm very sick.
So this is gonna be some subdued gameplay.
I know.
I'll try and bring the energy for you.
I'll try and bring the gaunt.
I can knock people out with newspaper.
Ah, Hef.
Oh, my purpose.
I'm going to be a paper delivery man.
Just call me paper boy.
I need clothes to blend in, though.
I don't look like a paper boy right now.
It just looks like an angry man who is about to beat up some wasps that have entered his house.
Do you think I could kill her?
Sorry.
Knock her out.
Do you think I could deliver some paper to her and steal her clothes?
That would suit me very nicely.
No time like the present paper delivery.
Okay, Simon, take down.
Ah, sure.
Why not?
Okay, well, I can't have your clothes, so my bad.
Um oh, I needed a crowbar for that.
Oh, this is just embarrassing.
Now she led me to my one and only the screwdriver.
She led me back home.
I miss my screwdriver.
Aw, dude, it's gonna be awesome.
Do you think I could kill everybody in this map if I'm good enough?
Which, of course, we all know I am.
All right.
Try to put this puzzle together.
Let me take out my paper.
My paper is the real weapon.
Yes.
Paper delivery.
Okay, she's out.
She's down.
I know this guy.
He's already asleep.
But just to make sure Now I am the deputy now I am the police officer.
That's all you need to do to get ahead in life.
Just steal someone's codes and then you'll get what you want.
I was going.
Yes, it is me.
Mr Officer.
Mr.
Policeman Officer.
Nothing here is different.
I just need a crowbar.
Thank you.
Police officer Man.
Mr.
Out.
See you later or I don't trust you not to wake up.
So sorry.
All right.
Open up the manhole.
Can I Can I put bodies in here?
Huh?
Did the sewer you go like the trash you are.
Body knew.
Marot does body number three dump infinite bodies.
And this, this is this opens up a whole new world of possibilities.
This is about to go off.
Everybody in this town is gonna die and land in the sewers.
More newspaper?
Yes.
Sorry.
You're coming with me.
Life season.
They have muffins.
Oh, I could kill people with muffins.
I could be called the muffin man.
The man, The muffin man, The muffin man.
Never suspect you think anyone saw me, but it's great.
I need the muffins, though it's time to deliver the news.
Agreed.
Hello.
So nothing.
You saw nothing.
Oh, God.
Oh, lady.
Huh?
You saw nothing.
This is all going according to Kake Haku.
Easy does it.
Easy to everyone's fine.
Only one death.
Actually, sir.
Stop resisting.
You must go in the hole.
Everybody goes in the hole.
You get your news, you go in the hole.
All right.
Now that everyone's dealt with, I need my newspapers back now.
I can get all the muffins.
Well, the muffins for my Yes, I've been upgraded.
Went from a paper delivery boy to the muffin man.
Yes, I know the muffin, man.
All right.
Who wants to get knocked out by him often?
I've got a cannon for honor.
I think we found our first prime candidate for six.
Oh, good.
That's knocked him out.
Oh!
Oh, Eat, muffin.
Ah, you don't see anything.
Completely irresponsible.
Person would leave a weapon lying around Breaking news you don't know is that breaking?
Is your neck all right?
Into the hole?
You go.
You're the best muffin man.
Who's the best muffin man you are.
You got this.
You can erase the entire town if you really set your mind to it.
The muffins didn't work.
They were a distraction.
A red herring.
But the newspapers do work.
You got this?
You guys cannot be allowed for genius.
You guys cannot be allowed to have this conversation.
Did you go, lady into the furnace?
You go.
I may make I'm a bake.
Terrific cakes.
But I also make a mean meat casserole.
Incinerate.
All right.
And you go start you as well and incinerate nicely.
Don't I can disguise myself a ceremonial robe of some sort with note from Janus attached.
Yes, the notice.
Interesting.
Look, amazing.
Has asked Helen to do a few repairs on the road before he leaves.
Whatever.
Can we talk about how cool my outfit is?
Look, this is valuable.
Swoosh!
Yes.
Oh, you're the best.
You're the You're the most handsome man of all.
You're the most handsome detective.
The muffin man rides.
You guys arguing?
You're arguing about again.
I can solve this argument easily.
I have some news for you.
Nice.
All right.
Into the hole.
Which it get the whole get the whole Thank you, sir.
You to breaking news?
Keep back my newspaper.
Steal my newspaper like that.
Come on into the hole with you, You're dead.
So it's not like you care.
And it.
All right, So I'm trying to kill someone named Janus.
Is his first name.
Hugh.
That would be wonderful.
Okay.
I mean, I mean, another screwdriver.
Yes.
I don't need it anymore.
I've upgraded from the screwdriver through the newspaper, but it's good backup to have no security camera.
That's right.
Inspect the generator.
Oh, God.
I always say the wrong thing out.
Inspector.
Generator!
Come on through.
That allowed, Atta boy.
Yes, but you didn't see that coming.
Snappy.
Sappy.
There he is, Hugh Janus himself.
Morphin Day, you say?
Can I Can I combine some muffins?
Could I combine their pills with muffins?
I don't know.
I don't think so.
Okay.
Some of the boys may have been a little snack newspaper it is.
Remember the first time I had blueberry muffin?
It was 1976 the American Embassy in East Berlin, in the old Prussian Officers Club.
I understand.
Whatever, man.
Telling your story already.
All right.
Do you think I could get him?
You think I can not come out right here right now?
I think I can ask.
That sounds incredible.
Yeah, he goes.
Had to deliver the news there, buddy.
Next nap.
All right.
90 night into bed.
You go.
Just talking to me.
I'm a nice man.
I'm a nice killer.
Why not just kill them willy nilly?
You know what?
I knocked about first, and then I killed him so they can't feel pain.
Look at this.
Kitchen Knives so boring.
Why would you use a kitchen knife when you could use screwdrivers in newspapers?
Who's the real big brain tactics?
Damn.
Janus may be looking for the bathroom.
I lied, Little henchman.
Wanna go walkies?
Ego?
Oh, that's delightful in catching me.
Oh, no cameras anymore.
I'm gonna get away with it.
The muffin man.
The road is long.
The vote is hard.
Trying to kill everybody in a town with just newspapers is very time consuming.
But it's good work.
Chefs kiss.
It'll be worth it.
In the end, when you get that sweet title and someday a lot of it, it's all gonna be worth it.
Sir, have you heard the term that an apple a day keeps the doctor away?
Okay, Okay.
Get the newspaper ready.
get the newspaper ready.
He's down.
He's down.
But he's not you.
They say the pen is mightier than the sword.
But the newspaper is stronger than the apple.
And the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree.
Doesn't little apple analogies isn't there too many?
If you ask me, I must say I am the best dress hit matter out.
All of the other dinosaurs wanted to bring the T Rex to the ball.
You go to sleep with your brother.
Hey, that's may.
I need more newspapers.
The paper boy needs more.
Is this another one?
Yes.
You can't be going around with two newspapers.
They need lots of backups.
Hit everybody immediately with.
I'm sorry.
What?
I can't I can't hear you.
What?
Don't Fastest paper in the West Fairy lights.
I know that you didn't do anything, but I need to get ready anyway.
Oh, there's four people here.
You know, This might be tricky, folks.
Are we gonna do this?
Okay, we're gonna be good about this.
Alright, Sneaky.
They'll never see you in the bushes.
Okay.
Fastest hat in the west.
Yes.
All right, All right, All right.
Now move on to screwdrivers.
Oh, God, Yes!
Get back here.
Get back here.
Where you going?
No.
Yeah, Yes.
She's just sick.
She was sick.
She she ate too much of the party.
I have to take her home.
Okay.
Well, nice chatting.
Yeah.
All gonna have to go in the hole one by one.
I don't make up the rules.
That's just how it is.
You get in my sights, you have to go down the hole.
There's paint.
Sit down there.
You guys have been better off than I do.
I get it because of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
They pizza and I live in a sewer.
That's good.
That's clever.
I just thought of a sewer pizza for dead people.
Yeah, I do.
It probably all started when I was about 10.
Yeah, it was rough.
It was rough from a young age.
But I get the whole okay by you can see the news report today.
It was crazy.
Here.
I'll let you look at it.
Blew three people tree newspapers.
What?
Trying to come after me, bro.
Look at this.
Fastest paper in the West.
That was very dramatic.
Raise my brother.
He had too much to drink.
at their party.
He's sick after I have to bring him home.
We didn't drive, though.
On Uber doesn't come out this fire, so we're gonna have to drag him home.
00 this is it.
This is his home.
We're here.
We're not gonna be a problem, are you, Lady?
You're gonna be a problem, are you?
You didn't see the bodies?
There's no bodies here.
Sit down.
No time for sitting down.
It's time for dying.
She's like, No, I don't want to go.
No, please don't take me up.
You're gonna have to go in the hole.
That's the way life works now while you're dead.
So that's that's a death works.
All right.
Bye.
Complaining.
Even in death, you're a pain in my dingus.
See this whole You guys, you're going in there, right?
New house for brand new boys.
Okay, so I'm talking.
Well, my fingers got weird like that.
What?
My finger slipped.
Webs.
Guys, it's crazy.
My fingers up.
Somebody tying your tenant.
There's another target.
My paper senses are tingling.
There's a lot of people at that party in there, though That's gonna be tricky to kill all of those.
I can make it happen, though.
That is known.
And Cassie.
I know.
Former Secret Service learned in tacitly Providence.
Harold Cassidy is assigned to protect him back at the beginning.
I just did a lap.
I did a lap of murder.
More newspapers around.
Meet a secret meeting, huh?
I know what's going on.
Crap.
Why are you here?
No, I had the perfect opportunity.
You're back, man.
All right.
I say I'm a shoe laces.
Yeah, I almost tripped over once.
It's crazy.
Have you guys seen the news today to see the weather report way?
Have.
Bob, Bob, Bob, Bob!
Bob, Bubba!
Bubba can take you out.
Yeah, good That way.
That's good.
He's playing alone.
He's a nice boy.
Pop up, up, Get up.
Silence.
Like the night you guys gonna do about it, huh?
Nothing.
Put that gun away.
There's no guns allowed around here.
This is a strictly newspaper only zone.
Thank you very much.
Look at all those faces that need newspapers.
All of these people have not been given the news yet.
I was gonna be this gonna prove to be quite tricky.
It's gonna be a greater the greatest test of my skills.
so far?
Oh, yeah, Long one.
Oh, what a throw At that distance Age of 47 the paper point is able to throw a piece of newspaper 40 yards across an open field will shatter your job.
What?
A man wants me to pick up weapons games like, Hey, do you want to go on goods?
Air?
Scary guns kill people.
I don't wanna pick up a gun and accidentally shoot someone to kill them.
You know, this guy's living his best life.
The fight check for you guys hang out here in the bathroom place and chilled this guy, wondering why half of the security team have just gone missing.
All right, this is a good chance to Oh, God, Don't go to the bathroom door.
Oh, God.
Ah, hi.
Huh?
It's like it's right.
It's right.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
Okay, okay.
Well, things have happened.
Okay, Pick up the gun for now.
That's cool.
Yep.
Uh, sappy neck breaking news.
Rubberneck is Cassidy taking care of?
Both targets are confirmed.
Killed.
Okay, All that remains now is to find the information we came.
Okay, on.
Get out.
Okay.
No problem.
No problem.
This is easy.
This is easy.
Paperboy knows what he's doing.
I think it up.
Think about okay.
That made me a little nervous.
But I did what I set out to do.
I killed him with paper.
That's good.
Now I just need to kill the rest of the town.
There could be no witnesses early in the bathroom.
Oh, look at these.
Know when the boys wanna hang out these hydro homies?
Oh, yeah.
Was hanging out.
Just vibing in the bathroom together with stuff, lads.
All right, this is a house of death.
Time to move on.
Well, sort of.
The newspapers know this paper.
Why?
Oh, Lord, for they lose it.
Is it in here off?
Don't ever leave me like that again.
You're not leaving the parody already?
Area.
The party's just getting started.
We haven't even begun to mess with you guys yet.
There you go.
You go.
I feel a little bad about this within the feeling passes, and I'm fine now.
You're in the bushes.
No one will ever find you here.
You guys can have all the privacy you want.
I know you wanted to leave the priority and go home.
You could just be together and be around people.
Well, now you never have to worry about that again, right?
How may actually gonna tackle this parity?
All the other so far have been, like one and one encounters, which hasn't really been that hard.
But this is really going to start getting tricky here.
I don't know how I'm gonna break people up and moves into different areas.
So many people over the parity over here.
Well, the good news is that all the bad guys will be taken care of.
With who?
A newspaper sniper tone.
I believe I've been able to take out everyone with newspapers.
This is ridiculous.
Is the best game ever making assist?
Uh what?
The vault, James.
It was a vault into suburban house towards this place.
Being my newspaper.
Gonna get to the bottom of this.
It's for sale.
You're selling a house with a vault in it?
That'd be awesome.
We could record on May.
Let's play is down there.
But no one would ever bother me.
I could do whatever I want.
I can yell to the high heavens and no one will ever hear me right now.
I can't do that.
because I'm sick, You know, I still can't because I own my own house and no one ever bothers me as well.
But let me make the joke.
Shut up!
Yes.
Come this way for you know you want followed the strange bald man with the cape.
Follow him.
Hey, you guys watching the news?
I have a much better way for you guys.
Thio read the news with guess what?
You guys want to know about it?
You guys wanna hear about it?
Breaking news.
They're square in the mouth.
Oh, excellent.
Oh, God.
Oh, God!
There's just people in the house.
Thistles!
Bad.
Hey, I'm Derek and Linda's friend here.
Have a newspaper.
Okay, okay.
Oh, my God.
Lady, don't even think I need to snap your neck.
I think you're doing that hole in your own already.
Well, just in case it was in this room.
Yes, I do need this room.
I also think I need your clothes.
Oh!
Oh, This all me with the body.
Oh, uh, okay.
This is okay.
I can see how it looks.
Bad.
I can see how bad this looks.
Um Okay, Okay.
Okay.
Well, this'll is very bad.
Everyone's on high alert.
Do you mean yourself?
You found yourself, Dad.
All right.
Yeah.
Okay.
Dry giveaway.
I need my other disguise.
Back then, I worked out well, I had that planned.
I disguised myself as the muffin man and then got spotted so they would look for them often.
Man, I'm throwing them after sent.
Look at them all.
Having fun and join themselves Makes me sick.
All of those faces without a newspaper thrown in.
Uh, this is bad thistles.
Real bad.
They are on my ass.
It's like it's like, come out the door.
Okay?
Newspaper will never be stopped.
The newspaper can never We fought back against the newspaper is the ultimate weapon.
Oh, don't you know no one will ever survive this?
Okay, I've given up on hiding bodies.
I have just given up on it.
Everyone's all over the place now, at this point.
Uh, okay.
Where's my hi hi?
Eight News up.
Wrong place, lady.
I'm determined to make this work.
I got to disguise myself.
So what's the problem?
What happened?
Who?
Who died?
That's That's crazy.
I know what's going on.
Call the police.
So weird.
What do you think you're doing?
I'm delivering the news.
What's it?
Look, I lost one of the newspapers as well.
It's in that car over there.
God does a body good.
Who did this?
Who killed that person?
Keepers.
Hi.
I'm somebody killed you.
The superstar who keeps doing this.
They can't keep getting away with it.
Somebody stop that!
I'm an officer of the law.
What's going on here?
Who did what?
When?
How seven people left.
I think these are the only people left in the map.
Okay, What can I do?
What can I do to make this happen?
All right.
I should poison some food with newspaper.
It's the ink.
Give you night blindness.
Come check them out there.
Hurt.
Hurt.
Oh, Somebody help them!
Oh, no!
He's hurt.
Somebody help him!
Booth!
Ice breaking news.
It's your neck.
It's not looking good, man.
Now there were five.
Yes.
Come on over.
Come on over, bud.
Oh, no!
What are you gonna D'oh?
Oh, no.
Oh, please.
Well, someone saw that.
Okay, well, what?
Peace was never an option.
Stop!
Stuff!
Stop!
Where's she going?
Where'd you go?
No witnesses.
Get back here.
Yes, longest throw.
Well, you're dead.
Your Dad, Your dad on your I think that's everybody.
I think I just killed everybody in the entire map with newspaper and muffins leads that does it for me.
The entire town has been cleared out.
The scum of this world is no more.
Everybody got their news today.
Everyone got their breaking news.
Everyone is a little bit smarter than when they started the episode.
This is a big wig.
I have never cleared out an entire level before.
It's a ridiculous fashion.
Well, into the sewer ego is a tiny trash child.
The paper boy leaves no witnesses.
It's a ghost.
So far, there's no more news to be delivered here today, folks.
So I'm gonna leave this one here.
That was beyond fun to Dio.
Don't forget to leave a light on the video If you liked it on.
Don't forget to subscribe If you want to see more hit man because I'm going to keep continuing to play this because I went away from it for a while And now I'm back.
We're back, everybody.
We're back to have fun and kill everybody.
Also new merch coming soon, You guys to see it in the store very soon.
Be excited.
It's very cool.
And I like it a lot.
Don't forget that the next time you see a paper delivery man around, you know what?
So great?