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  • Now, the second night of the Democratic debates just ended.

  • And of the two nights,

  • this was the debate everybody was waiting for.

  • You know, if last night was a small lower back tattoo,

  • tonight was Mike Tyson's face!

  • Because, coming into tonight,

  • we all knew it was about beef.

  • REPORTER: The stage is set for a second heated showdown.

  • Joe Biden, Kamala Harris facing off just hours from now.

  • REPORTER 2: High stakes rematch. Joe Biden and Kamala Harris

  • facing off again tonight

  • after her blistering attack in the first debate.

  • Biden vowing he won't be so polite this time.

  • Joe Biden telling donors it's no more Mr. Nice Guy.

  • I was probably overly polite in, uh, the way I didn't respond.

  • Yes, according to Biden, the last time he didn't do well

  • was because he was overly polite,

  • which is a convenient excuse for getting your ass handed to you.

  • I, uh... I used that same excuse

  • whenever I lost a fight in high school.

  • (crying): "The only reason he was able to shove me

  • in that locker is because I'm a gentleman."

  • So, in the buildup to tonight's debate,

  • the main story was Kamala Harris versus Joe Biden.

  • But because Cory Booker has also been going after Biden

  • for the past couple of weeks,

  • tonight's debate was set up for fireworks,

  • especially once we found out

  • where everyone would be standing on that stage.

  • REPORTER: Biden will find himself flanked

  • by Booker and Harris.

  • Biden standing in between two candidates

  • who have targeted him most,

  • Cory Booker, Kamala Harris.

  • And racial inequality could be a very big discussion.

  • Joe Biden is in an uncomfortable sandwich on that stage.

  • He's got on either side of him Kamala Harris and Cory Booker.

  • Yeah, Joe Biden, this was an unlucky draw, man.

  • Cory Booker on the one side,

  • Kamala on the other side, and he's in the middle.

  • It's like the world's most racially charged Oreo.

  • I feel like Joe Biden got on the stage

  • and just instinctively tried to lock his car doors.

  • He was like... (groaning)

  • "No attacks."

  • And if you tuned into the debate hoping to see conflict,

  • it didn't take long for you to get your wish.

  • Vice President Biden's campaign calls your plan

  • "a have it every which way approach."

  • Well, they're probably confused 'cause they've not read it.

  • There will be a public plan under my plan for Medicare

  • and a private plan under my plan for Medicare.

  • If you'll notice, there's no talk about the fact

  • that the plan, in ten years, will cost $3 trillion.

  • You will lose your employer-based insurance.

  • You can't beat President Trump with double-talk on this plan.

  • You're just simply inaccurate in what you're describing.

  • Your plan, by contrast,

  • leaves out almost ten million Americans.

  • So I think that you should really think

  • about what you're saying but be reflective and understand

  • that the people of America want access to health care.

  • That's right. Two minutes into the debate

  • and Kamala was already removing her earrings

  • and Biden was removing his hair plugs.

  • "Oh, it's on. It's on."

  • Now, this time, this time,

  • Biden and Kamala were arguing back and forth

  • about who had a stronger health care plan.

  • And compared, compared to the previous skirmish,

  • they were a lot more civil, as you saw.

  • You know? This was like a couple fighting

  • after the cops had told them to calm down, you know?

  • Just like, "No, I'm trying to keep my cool here,

  • "but your-your health care plan ain't shit,

  • just like your mama." (inhales sharply)

  • But other than that, other than that,

  • the health care debate was pretty civil tonight.

  • Again, the Democrats largely agreed

  • on the big picture of getting universal health care.

  • What they disagreed on is how to get there.

  • Biden proposed polishing Obamacare

  • and disrupting the system as little as possible.

  • Kamala wanted a Medicare plan that also incorporated something

  • that would include private insurance.

  • And Bill de Blasio, he just wanted to knock

  • the whole thing down, you know?

  • Just like he did to Tokyo.

  • So, to figure out

  • who had the best plan,

  • the Democrats got down to the numbers.

  • And I mean a lot of numbers.

  • Let's talk about math.

  • Let's talk about the fact that the pharmaceutical companies

  • and the insurance companies last year alone

  • profited $72 billion.

  • My plan costs $750 billion.

  • That's what it costs.

  • -Not $30 trillion. -Thank you, Mr. Vice...

  • That is 70%

  • of what the government will collect in taxes

  • over the next ten years.

  • 20% of our economy,

  • one out of every five dollars spent, on health care.

  • I don't know what math you do in New York.

  • I don't know what math you do in California.

  • But I tell you, that's a lot of money.

  • "Hey, I'll tell you what kind of math we got in New York.

  • "Number one and number two, asshole!

  • "That's the kind of math we got here!

  • -'Ey!" -(cheering and applause)

  • I'm-- Can I be honest with you guys?

  • This, this is the part of the debate

  • where I think Democrats really need to get a whole lot better.

  • No one at home can keep up with all of these numbers.

  • 40 billion, seven percent,

  • 70% over ten years, 30 trillion,

  • three trillion when you compound the--

  • No, it's too complicated, all right?

  • It almost made me miss Donald Trump. Yeah.

  • Because when he does math, he just comes onstage like,

  • "Folks, we're gonna do numbers.

  • Best numbers, bigger numbers."

  • And everyone at home is like, "Yeah, numbers.

  • I guess there's numbers."

  • You got to find a middle ground.

  • So that was health care.

  • Then came immigration.

  • And just like last night,

  • the major question facing Democrats was

  • how would they deal with the crisis at the border,

  • most of them agreeing, again,

  • that they would try and find a more humane way

  • to treat asylum seekers and illegal immigrants.

  • But when they brought up President Obama's record

  • of mass deportations,

  • Joe Biden probably wished that he could have been deported

  • out of this debate.

  • Vice President Biden, I didn't hear your response

  • when the issue came up of all those deportations.

  • You were vice president of the United States.

  • I didn't hear whether you tried to stop them or not,

  • using your power, your influence in the White House.

  • The president came along, and he's the guy that came up

  • with the idea, first time ever, of dealing with the Dreamers.

  • He put-put that in the law.

  • I don't hear an answer from the vice president. I'm confused.

  • Mr. Vice President, you want

  • to be president of the United States.

  • You need to be able to answer the tough questions.

  • I guarantee you, if you're debating Donald Trump,

  • he's not gonna let you off the hook.

  • I was vice president. I am not the president.

  • I keep my recommendations to him in private, unlike you.

  • I would expect you would go ahead

  • and say whatever was said privately with him.

  • That is not what I do.

  • Oh, hold up.

  • Did Joe Biden just call Bill de Blasio a little-ass snitch?

  • (laughter)

  • That's-that's what he said, right?

  • Yeah. I hadn't realized Biden was so true to the streets.

  • He's like, "Uh, Mr. Mayor, unlike you, I protect my neck,

  • "'cause these bitches ain't loyal.

  • That's what I do."

  • So, this is where the debate got interesting, right?

  • Bill de Blasio sucker-punches Biden out of nowhere,

  • asking him why he let Obama deport so many people.

  • And just when Biden is trying to battle the giant of New York,

  • Cory Booker jumps in with the shiv.

  • Mr. Vice President, you can't have it both ways.

  • You invoke President Obama more than anybody in this campaign.

  • You can't do it when it's convenient,

  • -and then dodge it when it's not. -Right.

  • Yeah. Cory Booker makes a good point.

  • Joe Biden's really good at using Obama

  • when it'll help hissumé, but then, when it comes to something

  • that Obama wasn't really great at, all of a sudden,

  • Biden's like, "Obama? Obama?

  • "Is that the Irish guy-- Patty Obama?

  • Is that who? I think I've been to that pub."

  • And that Obama line was just the beginning, right?

  • Because after that, Cory went on full-on attack mode.

  • Senator Booker called your new criminal justice reform plan,

  • "An inadequate solution

  • to what is a raging crisis in our country."

  • Why is Senator Booker wrong?

  • Well, I don't... I think he is wrong.

  • I think we should work together. He has a similar plan.

  • I think that we should change the way we look at prisons.

  • We have a system right now that's broken,

  • and if you want to compare records--

  • and frankly, I'm shocked that you do--

  • uh, I am happy to do that.

  • There's a saying in my community.

  • "You're dipping into the Kool-Aid,

  • and you don't even know the flavor."

  • -(groaning, clamoring) -Uh, you need to...

  • -Whoa. -(hooting, whooping)

  • Yeah! You know what's cool about being black

  • is you can just make up phrases,

  • and white people don't know if it's real.

  • (laughter)

  • (applause and cheering)

  • 'Cause we were watching the debate,

  • and every white person in the room just looked at me,

  • like, "Is that a thing? Is that...?"

  • Black people-- we can just say whatever.

  • Just be like, "Man, you better watch yourself,

  • "'cause right now, you deep frying a chicken.

  • but it ain't got no skin."

  • (laughter)

  • This is where Cory was in his element.

  • He had Biden on the ropes.

  • And he was always gonna have him on the ropes,

  • because Vice President Biden has been in politics for 50 years.

  • He is bound to have more baggage than anyone else.

  • It's not a fight that he could win.

  • And then, just when you thought

  • that Biden was the target of the night,

  • Tulsi Gabbard pops up from under the ring

  • and slams Kamala with the chair.

  • Senator Harris says she's proud of her record as a prosecutor

  • and that she'll be a prosecutor president,

  • but I'm deeply concerned about this record.

  • She put over 1,500 people in jail

  • for marijuana violations,

  • and then laughed about it when she was asked

  • -if she ever smoked marijuana. -(applause and cheering)

  • She blocked evidence...

  • She blocked evidence

  • that would have freed an innocent man from death row.

  • -And she fought to keep... -Thank you, Congresswoman.

  • ...cash bail system in place

  • that impacts poor people in the worst kind of way.

  • Yeah, that was a rough moment for Kamala,

  • 'cause while she was trying to come after Biden

  • for his history on criminal justice,

  • Tulsi Gabbard came after her for hers,

  • which isn't exactly the best record.

  • And you could see Kamala wasn't happy

  • in this moment, you know?

  • She was about to be like, "Tulsi, let me tell you

  • "a story about a little girl who got her ass beat,

  • and that little girl was you."

  • (laughter)

  • So now, you've got de Blasio coming after Biden,

  • Booker jumping in the middle, Gabbard hitting Kamala.

  • It was almost like

  • Quentin Tarantino wrote this part of the debate--