字幕表 動画を再生する 英語字幕をプリント Coming into this debate, there have been a lot of new developments. All right, Elizabeth Warren has surged in the polls. Joe Biden and his son have become targets of the Trump administration. Bernie Sanders had a heart attack. And last week, Pete Buttigieg snuck into his first R-rated movie -(laughter) -But... by far the biggest development since the last debate has been the impeachment inquiry into President Donald Trump. So that was the first topic of the night. I don't really think this impeachment process is gonna take very long, 'cause as a former prosecutor, I know a confession when I see it. This president had obstructed justice. This president, on three occasions, three occasions, has invited foreign governments and heads of government to get engaged in trying to alter our election. We have to impeach this president... He lied to investigators, obstructed justice, fired James Comey, head of the FBI, tried to fire Mueller... The president ten years, or a hundred years from now, will look back at this moment and draw the conclusion either that no one is above the law or that a president can get away with anything. Okay, I hear what you're saying, but let's be honest, the way the planet is going, in a hundred years from now, the president isn't gonna be worried about impeachment, he's gonna be worried about the price of lizard blood. -(laughter) -And as for Biden, his question was a little different. He was asked why it's not okay for a president's family to be working with foreign businesses and foreign companies but it's okay for a vice president's family to do. And I... I think I get where he was going, but it took a while for him to get there. Look, uh... my son did nothing wrong. I did nothing wrong. My son's statement speaks for itself. What I think is important is we focus on why it's so important to remove this man from office. On the 17... Look, the fact that... George Washington worried... on the first time he spoke after being elected president, that what we had to worry about is foreign interference in our election. Okay, one minute he's talking about his son, then it's George Washington, then something about the 17? Like, Joe Biden is the only candidate who remixes his speech while he's giving it. He's just like, "Removing this man from... (imitates record scratching) "...seven, on the sev, seven, seven, sev, 17th, and the fact, that the fact that..." This is, like, a weird thing that he does. And aside from impeachment, aside from impeachment, health care was a major topic tonight, with the standard debate about whether government-run insurance should be an option or the only option. But the thing that got the crowd going was when the O.G. of Medicare stepped into the game and showed everyone why they should put respect on his name. The issue is whether the Democratic Party has the guts to stand up to the health care industry, which made a hundred billion dollars in profit. Whether we have the guts to stand up to the corrupt, price-fixing pharmaceutical industry, which is charging us the highest prices in the world for prescription drugs. -(applause) -And if we don't have the guts to do that, if all we can do is take their money, -we should be ashamed of ourselves. -Thank you. Ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai! Bernie Sanders! -(cheering, applause) -You can't deny it. You cannot deny it. No one speaks about health care with the passion that Bernie does. I also have a suspicion that that's the same speech he gave every time the nurses tried to give him pills. He was like, "No more pills! "I have the guts to stand up to the pharmaceutical industry! I just need a nap. I'll be fine!" Now, you probably didn't notice tonight, but one of the 52 candidates on stage was Tom Steyer, right? Hedge fund billionaire and scarecrow from Oz. And... most people, most people only know Steyer from his TV ads where he calls on President Trump to be impeached. And if you think about it, it's a pretty cool perk of being a billionaire. You can just buy ads on TV and make everyone listen to what you want to talk about. Yeah. Like, if I was a billionaire, my ads would just be petty. You know, I'd be like, "Hello, I'm billionaire Trevor Noah, "and my Thai food was supposed to be here half an hour ago. "Please, somebody call the restaurant for me and see where it is." Anyway, you may remember, Bernie Sanders, a few weeks ago, made headlines by saying billionaires should not exist. So, of course, the moderators asked Tom Steyer, an actual billionaire, about Bernie's comment, and his answer was not what you'd expect. Senator Sanders is right. There have been 40 years where corporations have bought this government, and those 40 years have meant a40-year attack on the rights of working people, and specifically, on organized labor. I was one of the first people on this stage to propose a wealth tax. I would undo every Republican tax cut for rich people and major corporations. Yes, the billionaire just said the government needs to tax the shit out of billionaires. And you saw Bernie's face, he was like, "Is this a trap? Is this a joke? "Wh-What? He's taking my thing. You can't take my thing." And, you know, it seems weird, but when you think about it, it actually makes sense. If you're already a billionaire, you don't want more billionaires. Yeah, it makes it less special. You'd be like, "Yeah, tax them. I don't want them becoming billionaires." Yeah. It's the same way I think America has enough South African late night comedians. Like, yeah. Zero was too few, and one is more than enough. We get it. Apartheid. We get it. Move on. We get it. One's enough. (cheers and applause) So the debate then moved to foreign policy, in particular, President Trump's decision to pull troops out of northern Syria. And although all the Democrats had different proposals on how they thought they would handle the conflict in the area, they all agreed on one thing, that Trump is doing it wrong. What this president has done is that he has sucked up to dictators, he has made impulsive decisions that often his own team doesn't understand. What he has done is wreck our ability to do foreign policy because nobody in the world will believe this pathological liar. This president is caging kids on the border, and effectively letting ISIS prisoners run free. This president has betrayed American values... Turning the moral leadership of this country into a dumpster fire... We have an erratic, crazy president who knows not a damn thing about foreign policy. Okay, okay. Hold on. Hold on. You may not like Donald Trump but you can't say he doesn't know a damn thing about foreign policy. Because, unlike Trump, not one of these Democrats has congratulated the country of Nambia on their health care system, all right? And maybe that's because there is no country called Nambia, but that's not the point. The point is not one of you can find it on a map! (laughter) Now, since the debate was in Ohio, the moderators also spent time focusing on the opioid epidemic which has ravaged the Buckeye State. And the candidates had different thoughts on the problem but many of them agreed on who should help solve it. Let's go after these pharmaceutical companies for what they've been doing to destroy our country. They are nothing more than some high-level dope dealers. Until we hold those responsible, accountable for their actions-- Purdue Pharma, Johnson & Johnson, we're gonna continue to have this problem. The people that should pay for this, that should pay for the treatment, are the very people that got people hooked and killed them in the first place, and that is the people that are manufacturing these opioids. Yeah. Yeah. I 100% agree with Klobuchar. Drug companies should have to pay to rehabilitate all the people that they got addicted, oftentimes on purpose. And you know what? It shouldn't just be drug companies. Every industry-- If you create something addictive, you should be responsible for making it harder to consume. Like Oreos. If they're gonna make those cookies so goddamn addictive, the least they could do is after, like, every fourth cookie, put a mousetrap inside. Bam! Slows the addiction down. "Ow. I'll try again tomorrow." Yeah. Or, like, Pornhub. Pornhub-- every hour that you're on there, they should randomly pop up a picture of your grandmother. Just, you'll be like, "Ah! I guess I'm done. Hi, Nana." But the elephant in the room the whole night was Bernie's heart attack. And eventually, the moderators got around to asking about it in a very, very awkward way. There is a question on a lot of people's minds and I want to address it tonight. You're 78 years old and you just had a heart attack. How do you reassure Democratic voters that you're up to the stress of the presidency? If you're elected you will turn 80 during your first term. Last month former President Jimmy Carter said he could not have undertaken the duties of the presidency at 80 years old. Why are you so sure that you can? If you win the presidency, you would be the oldest president ever inaugurated in a first term. You would be 71. Congressman Gabbard, you're 38 years old, and you would be the youngest president if elected. Should age matter when choosing a president? Okay. Okay. Is it just me or did the moderators ask everyone about their health just to hide the awkwardness of them asking Bernie? Right? 'Cause they were like, "Bernie, heart attack." Then they're like, "But everyone. Everyone. Everyone." I even, like, get the part about asking people about being too old, but asking Tulsi Gabbard about being too young? Is that really a concern? "Tulsi, uh, are you too fit "and vibrant for the presidency? Is it possible you might die of young age?" And that-And that wasn't the weirdest part of the night. The weirdest part of the night might have been when Kamala Harris started a real life Twitter beef. Senator Warren, I just want to say that I was surprised to hear that you did not agree with me that on this subject of what should be the rules around corporate responsibility for these big tech companies, when I called on Twitter to suspend Donald Trump's account, that you did not agree. And I would, I would urge you to join me. Twitter should be held accountable and shut down that site.