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  • Everybody knows somebody who hates their job.

  • Maybe that somebody is even you.

  • In fact, half of the people in the United States who work

  • would do something else for a living if given the chance.

  • That's an epidemic.

  • Look, I know, it's hard to change,

  • it's easier to stick with the devil you know.

  • Walking away from a paycheck and benefits -

  • that doesn't fit conventional wisdom , and doing something more meaningful -

  • I mean, who wants to make less money?

  • But when I think about this subject, I think of my grandfather,

  • my immigrant grandfather who left Poland, alone, on a boat, at 17 years old,

  • to go to New York City.

  • I wonder what he would think about us talking about being happy at work.

  • "Happy?" he would say.

  • "Happy at work?

  • Put food on the table, that's 'happy.'

  • What are you talking about, happy?"

  • My dad, first generation American,

  • he was the first to go to college,

  • the first to have a "good corporate job,"

  • his was the 1960s' version of being happy at work.

  • But he really wasn't.

  • Today, the research shows

  • that to be happy at work, people want to be engaged.

  • They want to have mastery over their subject matter.

  • They do want to know

  • that what they do matters more than the paycheck they get.

  • So, if we know that, why is it

  • that 50 per cent of us can't figure out what we want to do with our life?

  • I think it's because when we are in doubt, we look to our resume.

  • We look to our credentials, what we're qualified to do.

  • What we're qualified to do is not necessarily what we're meant to do.

  • It isn't necessarily what's going to bring us satisfaction.

  • Think of an egg, if you will.

  • >From a little hummingbird egg to an ostrich egg,

  • all of them are roundish shell.

  • For people, that shell are our credentials, our track record,

  • our accomplishments, and our resume.

  • A lot of us get attached to that shell, it becomes our identity,

  • and that's what makes it hard to change.

  • But to get to the good stuff, you have to crack the egg open.

  • Because inside is the yolk, the golden center.

  • That's where the DNA is.

  • That's what determines how each egg is unique.

  • For people, I call that yolk their "life blueprint."

  • Everything that can be taken away is the shell.

  • The status, your identity, what people think of you,

  • the perks, the salary.

  • But what can't be taken away is the yolk.

  • That's where the discovery of career satisfaction can happen.

  • Maybe it's more important to understand

  • that career satisfaction doesn't come from what you do.

  • It comes from who you get to be while you're doing that job.

  • Who your job allows you to be,

  • that's where the happiness comes from.

  • So, the shell is what you do.

  • But the yolk is who;

  • who you get to be.

  • When I was in my 20s,

  • I wanted nothing more than to be a Broadway star.

  • Well, I did reasonably well; I got my union card,

  • I worked in reputable theaters, and I gave myself five years to make it,

  • and at year eight, I was still waiting on tables.

  • So, I grew despondent, I really did.

  • I was almost suicidal over the fact

  • that I thought that I failed at the only thing I ever wanted.

  • Why haven't this dream come true for me?

  • I'd worked so hard, I invested so much.

  • 10 years after I left show business, I had an epiphany about this.

  • I remembered a scholarship that I was up for,

  • for an acting program where they asked me:

  • "What would be possible if you were successful as a performer?"

  • The answer came to me in a flash.

  • I knew it was like the right answer, the Miss America pageant answer,

  • the eldest child answer,

  • the "I'm going to get the scholarship" answer.

  • So I went up to the mike and I said,

  • "Well, if I were successful as a performer,

  • people would see me on stage and be moved to change something in their life."

  • That answer got me the scholarship.

  • But it wasn't until ten years later when I realized what I really had said;

  • the performer was the shell causing change from the stage.

  • That was the yolk.

  • That was me.

  • So I hadn't failed at my dream after all;

  • I just suffered from a misinterpretation of my dream.

  • I needed to allow the dream to change form.

  • I think that's what's wrong for a lot of us

  • when we can't figure it out.

  • No one's taught us to pull the dream apart

  • and understand the true significance of it.

  • We're told we could be anything we want to be when we grow up.

  • But when we go to pick that college major,

  • the question changes from, "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

  • to, "How are you going to make a living with that?"

  • We haven't been taught

  • what are dreams and imaginations really mean to our career trajectory.

  • John was someone who heard me speak about this concept

  • and he was very skeptical.

  • He said, "Laura, I've accomplished everything I set out to do.

  • I've had every dream for my career come true.

  • So this cannot possibly hold any weight."

  • But at the time we met, he wasn't sure what he wanted to do next.

  • He was struggling with that.

  • I want to tell you a little secret:

  • I don't believe anyone who tells me they don't know what they want to do.

  • I believe they do know; they're just too afraid to speak it

  • because then they have to do something about it.

  • Anyway, back to John.

  • Since he challenged me, I said,

  • "Okay, what are all your career dreams that you had come true?"

  • He said, "When I was a kid, I wanted to be a magician.

  • As a young adult, I wanted to be an architect,

  • then I wanted to change and be in advertising and marketing

  • and be responsible for huge billboards in New York City."

  • He goes, "And now I want to do something with my love for the outdoors,

  • maybe an adventure travel guide or something."

  • But he couldn't reconcile how that fit with the rest of his life.

  • But I could see it.

  • So, this is where I need your help.

  • If you go -

  • if you go out and you see a wonderful magic trick,

  • one that blows your mind, what's your reaction?

  • Show me on your face what your reaction is.

  • Audience: Wow!

  • Laura Berman Fortgang: Wow!

  • So, if you go to a city that you've never been to

  • and you're looking up at the architecture,

  • what does your face look like?

  • Alright, now if you've been to New York and ever seen a billboard so large

  • that a woman's navel is the size of a cruise ship,

  • what does your face look like?

  • Wow.

  • So, you see.

  • Everything that John did evoked a universal human response.

  • Across culture, language, or age, "Ooh, aah, wow."

  • All those jobs were what he did,

  • but who he was was someone who inspired awe.

  • If you go out in nature, you will be in awe.

  • So, it was completely in his blueprint for him to go and become someone

  • who worked in nature and took others into nature to inspire awe.

  • Today, he owns a company

  • where he designs and manufactures gear for outdoor enthusiasts.

  • He found his way.

  • So, the formula seems to be:

  • something from the past whether it has come true or not,

  • re-examine for its true significance,

  • married with your skill set of today,

  • equals a satisfying new chapter.

  • Now, there are people who have said to me over the years

  • that they've never had a dream,

  • that they never had anything that ever called to them,

  • they don't have any memory of anything

  • they'd ever wanted to be when they grew up.

  • Over the years, what I've seen as a common thread among these people

  • is that they all had a rougher childhood than most.

  • They either grew up in a dysfunctional home,

  • maybe there was raging, maybe there was alcoholism,

  • perhaps they were worried

  • that a relative who was sick or sibling who was sick,

  • they didn't know if they were coming or going,

  • any child who has to keep their guard up all the time,

  • and doesn't feel safe can't dream.

  • If that's any of you, don't worry, there is a solution for another time.

  • I've also met people who have had a round of success with their career,

  • but it was based on something that was a reaction from their past.

  • So, they succeeded,

  • but now they don't know what to do because they have no criteria.

  • So, that thing from the past, if any of you have ever made a vow,

  • anyone who'd ever said, "I won't be like my mother,"

  • or "I won't be like my father,"

  • or "I'll never be poor," or "I'll show them," that's a vow.

  • If you did that,

  • it was a reaction to circumstances of your life,

  • and it probably served you well.

  • Look, a lot of people have a lot of ambition

  • based on things they don't want in their life.

  • But there may come a point

  • where that motivation is no longer useful to you

  • because you've outgrown it.

  • And then, what do you do?

  • Karen was someone that I met in this situation.

  • She was a top salesperson, she won all the cars, all the trips,

  • but she started talking about how she was feeling really anxious

  • because she felt like she was losing her mojo.

  • She didn't know if she could keep up this pace

  • and she didn't know how to discipline herself

  • to be as ambitious as she was before.

  • I suspected that there would be something

  • in her story that would tell us what was going on.

  • So, there it was; at 17, she was ready to accept a scholarship

  • to play basketball for college,

  • and she found out she was pregnant.

  • She gave up the scholarship, she had the baby, and she made a vow.

  • "I will not be a teenage statistic."

  • She had that baby, she had another baby with the same guy,

  • then she married him, went to school, got this great job, succeeded wildly,

  • and now she couldn't figure out why she could make it work.

  • Well, she wasn't a teenager anymore,

  • and she had well proven that she wasn't a teenage statistic.

  • So, once she had the awareness

  • that she needed to just change why she worked,

  • the motivation for why she worked, she was on to new paths.

  • So you see, your resume is only part of the equation.

  • All the things that happened which made that resume,

  • that made your life story, that's what reveals your blueprint.

  • That's what reveals the themes and the imprint

  • that is your yolk.

  • I want to live in a world where people stop competing at work,

  • because they realize that they are so unique

  • that there's nobody to compete with.

  • Everyone's unique, we don't cross over, we don't have to compete.

  • I want a world where we don't torture our teenagers to figure out

  • what they want to do with the rest of their life at 17 years old,

  • because we've taught them

  • that their dreams have many ways that they can come to be.

  • I'd like to see a world where nobody suffers to make a living

  • because they understand that they are not wedded to the shell,

  • but they can evolve from the yolk.

  • So, before, I told you that half of the people in the U.S.

  • would do something different if given the chance.

  • Half!

  • That is an epidemic.

  • But it's an epidemic that has a cure.

  • The cure is understanding

  • that career satisfaction doesn't come from what you do.

  • It comes from who you get to be while you're doing it.

  • The beauty is, who you get to be is the real you.

  • Thank you.

  • (Cheers) (Applause)

Everybody knows somebody who hates their job.

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【TEDx】Find your dream job without ever looking at your resume | Laura Berman Fortgang | TEDxBocaRaton

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    Ariel Lin   に公開 2017 年 05 月 08 日
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