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  • Oh my God yeah!

  • Anyways you guys before I go I have one more good story to tell you

  • I took a... I took a road trip about a year ago after I got rid of the beetle

  • in the SUV. Took a road trip from LA to Phoenix to go perform at this club

  • Let me tell you who's in the car. I'm driving

  • I got my buddy Armando riding shotgun he's another fluffy guy

  • We call him sexy bitch

  • I don't call him that his wife calls him that, "He's a sexy bitch"

  • Anyway, the back seat I got my friend Martin

  • Next to him is my friend Felipe.

  • So we take off

  • We're on the 10 freeway we're passing all these Indian casinos

  • Sorry, we're stupid like that! Anyway...

  • All of a sudden all these cars start passing me, right?

  • I'm getting annoyed because I'm driving a...

  • I said next car that tries to pass me

  • I'm not gonna let em. So I'm looking in the rearview mirror waiting... looking... waiting

  • waiting and I see a silver dot. The silver dot turned out to be a little car with two

  • hoochies in it right?

  • Now some of you guys are like how do you know that they're hoochies?

  • 'Cause my friend Martin was in the back seat going

  • I feel a disturbance in the force.

  • They tried to go around and I cut em off

  • I'm having fun, they're back there E E E whatever

  • My friend Felipe's in the back seat

  • yelling at me, Fool, what are you doing?

  • I go dude, don't worry I'm having fun

  • Gabriel you're going to get pulled over.

  • Dude I'm ok, it's cool. We're arguing going back and forth

  • I'm not paying attention, I don't see

  • a California highway patrol officer creeping up on us

  • All of a sudden I hear

  • I look at the speedometer... 102

  • Oh, I freaked out

  • The little car that was behind me with the two hoochies

  • they got pulled over because they were going just as fast

  • I'm in the front seat of my car freaking out, oh my God I'm gonna go to jail, I can't believe it

  • I'm on the verge of tears

  • From the back seat I hear my friend Felipe,

  • Fool what are you crying for, what are you crying for fool?

  • You're not the one with weed in his pocket are you?

  • You have drugs in the car?!

  • I told you to slow down didn't I?

  • But noooo because chu knows everything

  • Shoot, everybody roll down your window

  • Air out the car

  • Mondo fart, do something man

  • The cop walks over to the window looks in, sees my face

  • Recognizes me from TV right

  • He's like hey I know you

  • You're a comedian

  • Yeah, you're that guy from Comedy Central you're the guy that

  • does that joke about his friend at a hotel and you crank call him and you call him a

  • dirty mexican and then you go

  • But it was funny huh? Oh I love that joke!

  • That one and when you go chocolate cake! Oh I love that joke!

  • I hate to do this to you but we got two cars involved

  • I need your license and registration

  • Ok here you go here you go

  • So he takes my info goes back to the car with the

  • two girls in it, right? The whole time he's back there I tell everybody in the car

  • Check it out he just recognized me from TV

  • Maybe if we have some fun with him

  • Crack some jokes maybe he won't take the car

  • I don't care if I get a ticket but as long as he doesn't take the car

  • Mondo be silly, crack a joke

  • Martin be funny

  • Felipe? What fool? Shut the hell up

  • So the cop comes back to the car

  • What the hell were you doing out there?

  • Before I could think of something funny to say, from the back seat I hear

  • Fool, he was testing the suspension

  • Oh my God this pothead's gonna get me arrested

  • Officer I'm sorry that's my friend Felipe that's the guy from the special

  • That's the guy who says but it was funny huh

  • He's just trying to get me in trouble I'm really sorry

  • Whatever...

  • So he goes back to his squad car with my driver's license and he's swiping it in a computer

  • The whole time he's doing that he's being yelled at

  • from the back seat of my car

  • Hey officer!

  • Thank God you have a computer!

  • Last week we got stopped in Mexico... That fool had a rolodex!

  • The cop starts dying

  • I go oh we got em going, we got em going

  • I told my buddy, Mondo give me my CDs

  • I take out my bad boys 2 soundtrack and I pop it in

  • Track 3 is the theme song to cops

  • I tell my friend Felipe tell me when the cop starts walking

  • Ok fool here he comes

  • I crank that song as loud as I could

  • Bad Boys

  • What chu gon' what chu gon' what chu gonna doooo

  • Best part now the cop is walking to the beat

  • Even better than that the two hoochies in the car can hear the music and they're freaking out like

  • Oh my god, we're gonna be on TV

  • The cop goes to the girls gives them a ticket let's them go

  • Looks at our car and at this point we're like halfway through the song right

  • We're like that might be going to be no rookie

  • police don't give me no break I don soldier la la la la la chimica

  • Bad boys bad boys

  • We got our arms out the window like a bunch of idiots

  • The cop is in the middle of the freeway dying

  • He walks over to the window and he's like

  • SHUT IT OFF!

  • Yes sir

  • Hands me my license and the registration and he tells me

  • Gabriel...

  • I want you to do me a big favor. I want you to keep his tank under a hundred

  • You think you can do that?

  • Do that for me

  • Keep on doing what you do

  • And you have yourself a nice day

  • w w w w... that's it?

  • No ticket?

  • No ticket

  • I don't know what possessed me to look at this man and go whyyy????

  • How come the girls got a ticket?

  • And he tells me the coolest thing, he says

  • 'Cause they couldn't make me laugh

  • Wooo wee!

  • You don't understand Gabriel I've been on the force now for 26 years

  • This is hands down the funniest damn traffic stop I've ever been a part of

  • Do you have any idea how hard it is to give two sluts a ticket while listening to cops?!

  • I damn near pissed myself I was laughing so hard

  • This is going in the books as one of the funniest things to ever happen

  • to a police officer I swear to God

  • The only story better than this one is a buddy of mine pulled over some fat guy

  • that gave him doughnuts

  • So he starts walking away, right

  • And just as I'm about to start the car

  • So does that mean I could keep my weed?

  • I turn around to yell at my friend

  • Too late, the cop is at the window

  • You want to run that by me again son?

  • You heard what I said fool

  • Oh you think this is a big joke don't you

  • You think that just cause I gave your buddy here a break

  • I know who he is, I like what he does

  • I don't know you I don't like you... Step out of the car

  • I turn around and my friend Felipe is like woahhhh....

  • I'm so scared

  • And the cop pulls out his gun

  • I'm freaking out , I'm like oh my God!

  • Back seat, my friend Felipe ooohhhhh ooohhh I am so scared

  • Fool he is good, he is good

  • And then he points it at him

  • The look on my friend Felipe's face

  • PRICELESS

  • Are you serious?

  • Are you serious?

  • I'm gonna go to jail?

  • I'm gonna go to jail?

  • The cop was like

  • Nah!

  • But that was funny huh?!

  • I love you Bakersfield

  • Thank you!

  • I don't know

Oh my God yeah!

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B1 中級

"Road Trip" - Gabriel Iglesias- (Hot & Fluffyコメディ・スペシャルより ("Road Trip" - Gabriel Iglesias- (From Hot & Fluffy comedy special))

  • 709 29
    Noman Ebart Sam に公開 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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