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  • [Theme song]

  • Hellooo, I'm the Nostalgia Critic. I remember it so you don't have to.

  • And welcome to another edition of Old vs. New.

  • It's the fairy tale that teaches kids all around the world

  • that it doesn't matter what you look like or where you come from,

  • as long as you work hard and have a kind heart,

  • you too, can get a makeover.

  • Cinderella is a tale that's been told countless times,

  • but the most definitive version belonged to Disney Animations in 1950.

  • So it only figured when you have a money maker so iconic that it's cemented in everybody's memory,

  • you remake it 65 years later!

  • To much surprise though, not only were there big names and astounding visuals,

  • but it also got quite the critical backing, too, with people praising it for being such a stylized update!

  • But as always, which one is better?

  • Which one feels the most engaging, clever and all around magical?

  • Now, of course, being of the NOSTALGIC persuasion, I have a little bit of a leaning towards the old.

  • *Whimsically* If only I could wish for someone who had an opposite opinion of me...

  • *With slightly more force* If only I could wish for someone who had an opposite opinion of me...

  • If only I could-- WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?!

  • Hyper Fangirl: Sorry! This thing's really hard to walk in.

  • Critic: Christ, even when I WANT you in a video you can't get it right!

  • Hyper: Hey! Give me a chance, I have whimsical support on this one.

  • Critic: Yeah? Who?

  • [EXPLOSION HOLY MOTHER OF SOCKS]

  • "Answer": DEVIL BONER!!!!!!

  • Critic: Oh, great, what whimsical support can YOU offer?

  • Devil: Hey, I can get in touch with my feminine side!

  • Watch! Sparkles!!

  • Butterflies!!

  • EXPLOSIONS!!

  • Hyper: No.

  • Devil: No? O-okay, no explosions. No explosions. But, um...ponies?

  • P-PONIES!

  • Critic: (sighs) How are you two still a thing?

  • Devil: What can I say? I love a woman that writes fanfiction about me.

  • Hyper: Oh, and we both held you hostage that one time. So we have that in common

  • Devil: You did it better. Hyper: You did!

  • Devil: No, you did Hyper: You did! (repeats)

  • Critic:*clears throat* Hyper, isn't Benny gonna feel weird that you have another outlet for mindless violence?

  • Hyper: Oh, come on! He's a professional assassin. This kind of thing doesn't bother people like him

  • (sad piano music)

  • Benny: It's nothing, Benny. Nothing. Just add her to the list.

  • Critic: Okay, are you gonna debate me on these Cinderella movies or not?

  • Hyper: There is no debating. The new one is better,

  • if for no other reason that the lead actress had to lose two ribs to fit into that dress.

  • Critic: But it's so sexist and bland.

  • Hyper: The ORIGINAL is sexist and bland!

  • Critic: You just like it 'cause there's more flashy sparkles

  • to play to your inner five-year-old. You're a flaky-flaley-flashy-holic!

  • Devil: What did you call her?

  • Hyper: Honey! Honey! I'm gonna do the crossover. Why don't you go start a war with a random country?

  • Devil: Ooh! I get to use my random war generator!

  • Jamaica it is!

  • Critic: So, Hyper, are you ready to be proven wrong once again?

  • Hyper: The day you start being right.

  • Critic: Let's do Cinderella: Old vs. New.

  • Critic: Sometimes a prince leaves no impact on you, whatsoever.

  • Hyper: Dude! Too soon...

  • Critic: I was talking about the royal position!

  • Hyper: And I'm not.

  • Critic: *sigh* He's the arm-candy of our main character's dreams

  • Let's take a look at best prince.

  • Critic: While a lot of people give flack to some Disney princesses for not having enough character,

  • people forget the princes often weren't even given TIME to have character.

  • Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, and- yes- Cinderella, all have princes with only a handful of lines.

  • Hyper: And where the one from Sleeping Beauty fought a dragon

  • and the one from Snow White saves her from death,

  • this one yaaaawwnnns.

  • Critic: Ok, Look, this was a different time. A time when...

  • Hyper: Yawning was an attractive trait?

  • Critic: I don't think you're taking into account how sexy that yawn was.

  • Hyper: Heck, his father gets more screen time than this. So does his servant for that matter.

  • Critic: Yes, yes but... through them we're discovering the prince's character

  • and they're also relaying the chemistry between our two romantic leads an-

  • Hyper: You got nothing. Critic: I got nothing

  • Hyper: Now, with the remake, not only is the prince given a lot more onscreen time

  • but there's also more time to develop their chemistry

  • Cinderella and him meet before the ball and they have time to talk like normal people

  • and build and appreciation of each other.

  • Even during the ball, they talk and share experiences that help them build a stronger connection.

  • She doesn't just see him and declare, "This is love!" like in the original

  • Critic: *sarcasm* I wouldn't know anybody who did that.

  • Hyper: I've moved on Critic, I found a more sensible love.

  • Devil: Hey babe, it turns out it's easy to start a war in this place.

  • You just tell'em Cool Runnings is a 100% true story!

  • Devil: Will do. AAAAAHHH!!! (gun shots)

  • Critic: Okay, so maaybe this prince has more charm, more personality, more screen time

  • more chemistry and preeetty much more of a connection with everyone he comes in contact with

  • but there is one thing that prince does NOT have.

  • Critic: A shit ton of eyeliner!

  • Hyper: Dude, again, too soon!

  • Critic: Just take the point.

  • Hyper: After you give him an apology.

  • *sigh*

  • He's waiting.

  • Disney has always created the greatest villains.

  • And what's scarier than a middle-aged woman who's obsessed with housework?!

  • Hyper: Virtually anything!

  • Critic: This is best villain.

  • Critic: This one is rough because it really is like comparing apples to oranges.

  • Hyper: Well, to Snow White that's an easy choice.

  • Critic: The original is said by many to be one of the greatest Disney villains ever.

  • With her style, grace and love of all the villainous things she does.

  • The only downside is that it's only explained in narration why she doesn't like Cinderella,

  • because of this, it's a little harder to identify with her motivation.

  • Hyper: In the new film, we see how her bitterness is born. She hears her husband confess that he preferred

  • the first wife more. Which makes her angry towards his offspring all the more understandable.

  • We also see her slowly lure Cinderella into the role of servant

  • showing how patient and manipulative she can be.

  • Critic: The downside to that is, it may make her too human by comparison.

  • Which one is more frightening?

  • The one's that motivations are made totally clear?

  • Or the one shrouded in mystery, you're supposed to have no sorrow for.

  • The original was so slimy and hateful; there was virtually no good in her at all,

  • while the new one is so fragile and relatable that you can see the tragedy

  • play out in every mean spirited move she makes.

  • The original acts like someone in control

  • while the remake acts like someone who wants to be in control.

  • Hyper: I guess it's kindd like comparing Zuko with Frollo.

  • Boy, one of them needs a breakfast cereal.

  • One is sympathetic while the other is pure evil,

  • both still coming off as complex and interesting.

  • So how do we really judge which one is best?

  • Critic: Well, I guess whichever one scares up the most is the most intimidating.

  • Hyper: Well, I guess that speech that the new one made in the dark is creepy in it's own righ-

  • (BOOM)

  • WAH! Uh..! But the new one has the mind of a sociopath which is very psychologically terrifyin-

  • (BOOM)

  • AAHH! But the new one has a more developed past! Allowing her to-

  • (BOOM)

  • OKAY! She wins!

  • God, that look is scary.

  • Critic: *chuckles* Some people can't just handle a good old fashion death glare.

  • (BOOM)

  • DAH! You whore!

  • Hyper: Remember, I can point just as hard as you.

  • Critic: Yeah, we seem to have unbelievable power with this, don't we?

  • (BOOM's repeating)

  • *both scream*

  • Hyper: Never forget...

  • Critic: Hey Hyper, by any chance, are you of Indian decent?

  • Hyper: No? Why?

  • (funky battle music)

  • (battle music

  • (gunshot)

  • (bullet ricochets)

  • Devil: There's twenty metal plate in my head

  • The only downside is, I don't know what half the words beginning with 's' means.

  • Ask me the definition of seagull.

  • Hyper: What's the definition of seagull?

  • Devil: Stop making up words, honey!

  • Benny: You don't get it.

  • When you hire an assassin, you use ONLY him.

  • For life.

  • Devil: No YOU don't understand.

  • When you have a review already full of a ton of estrogen.

  • Critic: HEY!

  • Devil: And the good looking half of that estrogen is threatened

  • you awaken a demon that will not sleep into the nigh-

  • Oh, by the way honey, I got you a hat.

  • Hyper: *gasp* Thank you so much, woobles!

  • Devil: No problem, babe.

  • Into the niiiiggght.

  • Benny: You might be good with a gun

  • but you're nothing compared to my stealth.

  • Devil: HAH! I can see you coming a mile awa-

  • I was looking RIGHT AT him.

  • How did he do that?

  • Hyper: Is something wrong, possum-bear?

  • Devil: Nothing, heart-eater.

  • You and your lady-friend keep talking princesses

  • Critic: *disgruntled* Stop calling me that.

  • Devil: I have to bury my bullets in bloody bastard that I bet!

  • Hyper: NO!

  • Devil: No?

  • Hyper: This one has more bullets!

  • Devil: I love you, skull-crusher!

  • Hyper: I love you, turtle-duck!

  • *kisses and screams with gunshots*

  • Hyper: Back to the debate!

  • Critic: *whining* But.... that all sounded amazing!

  • Hyper: Critic...!

  • Critic: *angrily* Okay, fine! This is best side character!

  • (distant explosions and gunfire)

  • *whines*

  • Hyper: Although everyone remembers the talking mice in the original, they're very scaled down in the remake,

  • to the point where they don't even speak.

  • Critic: A different tone to say the least,

  • but everybody looves the singing mice and their...

  • "Leave the sewing to the women!"

  • slightly sexist lines.

  • HEY! Stallone knitted a sweater!

  • But c'mon, who could forget Lucifer, the cat?

  • Or the horse? Or the dog?

  • The king and servants? The stepsisters?

  • These are character we all remember.

  • Hyper: Yes, you remember them because there's a ton of time devoted to them.

  • Too much time.

  • In the remake, the supporting cast stays exactly that: supportive.

  • In the original, they hijack the movie on several occasions.

  • While they're cute and all, they take time away from the more important elements like the prince,

  • and the chemistry that's supposed to build between him and Cinderella.

  • Critic: But hey! You were talking about how the king gets way too much time in the old one

  • he gets just as much time in the new one!

  • Hyper: Yes but it's with the prince.

  • Every scene with him is helping develop the prince's character even more

  • establishing his responsibilities, his goals, and his connection with his father.

  • We never even see the prince and his father in the original, apart from the eye roll.

  • Critic: But again, it was a very passionate eye roll.

  • Critic: I suppose that last big one to talk about is the Fairy Godmother.

  • In the new one she's played more for laughs because

  • well, she's Helena Bonham Carter and... that's what you do with her now.

  • Hyper: But you have to admit, some comedy is VERY welcomed after Cinderella's at her lowest moment.

  • And also, she has to prove her worth by disguising herself as a homeless lady looking for water.

  • And it's only after Cinderella gives it to her that she grants all her wishes.

  • Critic: But isn't that kind of pointless?

  • She has to know she's a kind person if she's showing up there

  • I mean, watching her like a GOD MOTHER?!

  • Hyper: Maybe but have you figured this?

  • Cinderella is in shambles: she can't go to the ball, her dress is ruined, and her family hates her.

  • Most people in that state would be too frustrated to be nice to the old woman

  • so by helping someone else, even in one of her worst moments, it cements what a good person she is.

  • Critic: I guess but I don't know. The old one talks to her like a loving grandparent.

  • Someone she's familiar with enough to know she would do that anyway she has a warmth in a comfort that

  • needs to be seen after such hardship.

  • I wouldn't want to laugh after going through all this!

  • I would want to feel supported and after years of slaving for your family, suddenly being put to a test

  • to see if you're a nice person, does not seem very supportive!!!

  • Hyper: Okay, maybe the fairy godmother is a little better in the original

  • Critic: Did I mention she's a liar too?

  • "And you'll find they're really comfortable."

  • I got glass sneakers because of her!

  • THEY HURT!!!!

  • Hyper: But the fact remains that the supporting cast does more than support

  • They take over. They steal scenes that shouldn't have to be stolen by them.

  • While there's still focus on Cinderella and the stepmother,

  • other important elements are being overlooked

  • and the new film keeps the focus where it should be.

  • The main characters stay main characters and supporting roles stay the supporting roles.

  • Critic: *sigh* I guess I can't really fault you on that.

  • New gets the point.

  • Hyper: You forgot a heartless Prince joke

  • Critic: Shut up.

  • But as simple as a story is there's always room too muck it up

  • Trust me, Disney's done it before.

  • This is which one mucked it up less.

  • The funny thing about a simple story is that can be surprisingly tough to tell.

  • You want to connect with the characters in a relatable set up but even in an hour and a half

  • you have to know what to expand on and what