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I don't hate school, but I'm still happy that I no longer have to go there.
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Cyprien, you're in danger of death, you have 2 choices to stay alive.
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The first choice, I send you back in time with this remote,
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No no no, not that!
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The second choice, I make you listen to a little song that I wrote, it's super cool.
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No no no, I'll take the first choice.
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Too bad for you, it was a great song.
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Teleportation...
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It's been several years since I finished school.
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However, I can't forget all of the little things that I hated in school,
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they're little things but they all annoyed the hell out of me...
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The pencil lead that stays in the pencil sharpener...
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When I smudge a line that I drew with my ruler...
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Trying to use a glue stick and there's no glue left...
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So I have to try and use the little plastic thing to get any glue out...
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So when you do that often, that means buy a new glue stick.
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Crumbling my paper when erasing...
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Putting my hand under the table and touching a piece of gum...
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Ew!
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My neighbor who does everything to avoid being copied...
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Entering the wrong room...
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Sorry for the... bye!
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Chewing on someone else's pen...
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You're chewing on my pen dude...
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Oh pouahh...
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Emptying my pencil sharpener in my bag...
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Stabbing myself with the compass point when I put my hand in my bag...
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Oh fuck!
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(The compass) AHAHAHAHAHAH!!!
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When the teacher erases the board but leaves a bit...
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At that moment I really get the urge to take the eraser
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and scrub that damn board so that it's totally clean,
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it's not that hard to do but I don't do it, otherwise
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people will think I'm crazy and I'll be humiliated for the rest of my school life.
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Looking at my watch twice in the same minute...
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Dammit!
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Getting pen ink on my fingers while putting on the cap...
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So I try to get it off with an eraser but my fingers stink afterwards.
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When the teacher wants to call on someone.
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So who's gonna do this problem?
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Here, the technique is to avoid all eye contact with the teacher.
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Cyprien!
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Fuck...
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But what annoys me the most in school, is when the teacher is absent...
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So it's been 15 minutes... should we leave?
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(Everyone) Yeah, yeah...
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Sorry for being late, get out your books and turn to page 43.
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Shit!
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But not everything sucks in school.
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There are even some small moments of joy,
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it's not very often but I love it.
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(substitute) the teacher is absent.
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YES!
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(substitute) We're going to watch a movie today.
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YES!
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(substitute) There's a protest going on.
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YES!
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(substitute) What exactly are we protesting?
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Who cares!
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My worst enemy at school, I remember like it was yesterday... *BOREDOM*
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When I was getting bored in class, I could do whatever I wanted,
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but no matter what, nothing was more interesting than the class in progress...
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The non-exhaustive list of what I would do when I was bored in class:
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Making squares in graph paper.
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Putting my finger in between the binder rings to see if it hurt.
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And I can say that it hurt a little but not much.
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Now I know.
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The girls would write SOLEIL (sun) with their calculators.
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The guys would write ELLE BAISE (she fucks) with their calculators.
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Taking out shards of paper from spiral notebooks.
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In the category of drawing:
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The rabbit behind the wall,
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The "S"with the weird shape,
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The flowers with the compass
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and filling in the squares on graph paper.
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Collecting the beads inside ink cartridges...
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I admit, there was no point to that.
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But if ever needed some, I would've had them...
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Building a blowpipe with an eraser.
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Making holes in an eraser.
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I made plenty of those, I don't know why.
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Bouncing my pen.
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That was pointless, but I did it anyway.
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Playing with the cap of my pen until it was bent...
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Listening to music with a headphone in my sleeve...
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That was smart.
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Building a missile with an empty pen, paper and glue...
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Straight into the ceiling.
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Of course when I was bored, I talked to my neighbor,
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but be careful, you can't get caught by the teacher, and
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as a result I developed some super skills.
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I was the best at "red light, green light".
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Very interesting, please continue sir.
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Don't get me wrong though, I worked hard at school.
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A bit...
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A tiny little bit...
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A teeny tiny little bit...
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And you, what do you think of school?
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Leave a comment, make yourself at home!
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Subtities by abaziky98 :) Sous-titrage par abaziky98 :)