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  • - [Voiceover] We love you, Eugene.

  • (body slams against ground) (crowd yells)

  • - That boy got turnt, though.

  • (robust dance/rap music)

  • - UFC gym. Sears Outlet.

  • I know where I'm going.

  • - Today we are here at a UFC gym to meet

  • some professional UFC fighters and fight each other.

  • (yelling and screaming) (playful background music)

  • - I have no fighting experience,

  • I got punched in the nose once in fifth grade.

  • - I've hurt someone's feelings.

  • - Apparently, Eugene has trained in martial arts.

  • That's not fair.

  • - (laughs) I feel like Zach might squeal

  • like a little piggy and it really excites me.

  • - If nobody gets hurt, that's a miracle.

  • (aggressive rock music)

  • What I know about UFC.

  • People from all kind of fighting backgrounds

  • come into an octagon and they,

  • hang out for three minutes or so.

  • - When I watch it on YouTube, it gets me going.

  • - So yeah, if I'm going to be beat up by anybody,

  • it might as well be a UFC champion, right?

  • - I'm Chuck, "The Iceman", Liddell,

  • former UFC light-heavyweight champ.

  • - Hi Chuck!

  • - UFC broke onto the scene in 1993,

  • as just a way to battle different styles against each other.

  • What we found out is, the best style is

  • a combination, is putting them all together.

  • - When you reach the UFC, you're the top of the top.

  • - And I feel like it's the true physical

  • and mental game of chess.

  • - Kicking ass is what I do for a living.

  • - [Everyone] Whoooooo.

  • - People like to watch other people fight.

  • - For us, how can we possibly do well at this?

  • - I mean, I'm lookin at you guys have the body of a god.

  • - You mean like Cupid?

  • - Like Zeus baby.

  • - Zeus? - [Anthony] - Zeus,

  • my man right here, you gonna be Zeus.

  • (robust dance/rap music)

  • - [Bruce Buffer] Anthonyyyy "Rumble" Johnsonnnnn.

  • - When I get ready for a fight,

  • or when I'm walking to the cage,

  • I don't think about anything,

  • I just know I got somebody I gotta beat up.

  • - Just get zen.

  • - Yeah, I'm like it's just a fight.

  • What's the worst that can happen?

  • (punches landing)

  • - [Voiceover] Oh, another big shot. Another one.

  • - I can think of some pretty bad things that could happen.

  • - Are you like scared to get hit?

  • - Absolutely.

  • (foot hitting pad)

  • (laughing and yelling)

  • - Cause when I punch people, I don't punch them

  • just to give 'em a little love tap. (screams)

  • - Oh, oh my god.

  • - When I punch 'em I'm actually trying to hurt them

  • with every single bit of my soul.

  • (punches landing on bag)

  • - Yeah.

  • One, two.

  • - Percentage-wise strength, what are you at right now?

  • - Ten.

  • (laughing)

  • - You want to go to 50?

  • - I could, but I don't want to break your shoulder.

  • - Any last words--

  • - Wait, can we all kick Zach real quick?

  • (kicks landing on pad)

  • - Owww.

  • - And I'm back.

  • - And you're back.

  • - And I'm back.

  • - So, first and foremost,

  • tell us how you got into the sport.

  • - I went to college, tried to play soccer and,

  • I hated it.

  • - Wrestled in high school, wrestled in college.

  • - So soccer just wasn't violent enough?

  • - I think it was like the first time

  • I ever knocked the goalie down I was like, wait a minute.

  • - You know, they gettin' a good workout,

  • they can defend themself on the streets,

  • I was like, I'ma give this a shot.

  • - And, just from Day 1, I just fell in love with it.

  • - A guy saw me and he goes,

  • "hey, want to learn how to do Mixed Martial Arts?".

  • I said, "sure why not?", and started taking classes,

  • and that's how it began.

  • - I come here and lift the arm up,

  • go underneath the crotch.

  • - I hate this, I hate this.

  • - [Bruce Buffer] Lightweight champion of the world,

  • Mighty Mouse.

  • - Do you think it's gonna be really easy

  • or really hard to take down somebody as strong as me?

  • - Uh, very easy actually.

  • - (screams) Oh, no! My brain!

  • - Is this fucking amateur hour right now?

  • - It is. It's definitely amateur hour.

  • No, I missed my guard!

  • - It's always better to, make somebody give up and tap out

  • because it's like, "fuck, you got me".

  • - When you go here, you want to massage the achilles tendon,

  • and when you have it, you go here.

  • (screams in agony)

  • - That hurts so much.

  • - Now, what I gonna do is I'm gonna take his foot,

  • and put it in my armpit.

  • And I'm going here and I'm just gonna fall down.

  • - Like this.

  • (crowd yells)

  • What's your tactic?

  • - I will take it somewhere,

  • to where the other person is not good.

  • So, when you're here, his objective is to posture up.

  • And I can jump up here.

  • I do not endorse this at all, ok.

  • This right here I do not endorse.

  • - On the flip side, what was your worst personal injury?

  • - I got cut and it was, probably started from like here,

  • all the way down to my cheek.

  • - I broke my rib in a Muay Thai fight.

  • - Had my eyeball split open.

  • (nauseated groans)

  • - What!?

  • - And I remember walking back to the corner,

  • it would just pop in and out, and I would just be like,

  • and when I would breathe, I'd be like...

  • - And his finger went right in my eye.

  • (nauseated groans)

  • Yeah, they showed a replay, and you can see

  • where the guys finger goes missing in my eye.

  • (screams of disgust)

  • - What's the worst injury you've ever had?

  • - I got my penis caught in my zipper.

  • (painful groans)

  • - Oh, no!

  • - Not in a fight?

  • - No, that smokes it all.

  • - [Bruce Buffer] Chris Weiiiiidmannnn.

  • - I don't know if I've ever met anyone

  • who's a champion, of anything.

  • - Don't let me intimidate you. Come on.

  • - [Voiceover] And he got it. Just like that.

  • - I actually have a broken pinky right now.

  • - That's pretty bad, man.

  • - I figured I can dance around and I can kick a lot.

  • (kicks landing)

  • - The first kick we're gonna do

  • is the real basic, Muay Thai, kick.

  • (screams in pain)

  • I gotta step out on an angle,

  • which opens up my hips to turn my body.

  • (grunts)

  • (kick landing)

  • - Do you ever do jumping kicks?

  • - Yeah, you can do jumping kicks.

  • (knee landing)

  • (screams and laughter)

  • - My wife really didn't want me to do this today.

  • - So that means she cares for you.

  • - Yeah, that's true. - [Chris] That's nice,

  • my wife would probably make me do this,

  • just so I feel pain.

  • Grab the neck. - [Ned] Oh God.

  • - Nice and tight, you can shake them a little bit.

  • It comes down to who's smarter, it's all about deception.

  • Is your wife gonna like this?

  • - Yeah, I think so.

  • (grunts of pain)

  • - Alright, there you go. (laughing)

  • - I got, thrown around like a rag doll.

  • - What do you think is a really big misconception about UFC?

  • - Especially when we came in,

  • everyone thought we were a bunch of neanderthals.

  • - At the top of the game,

  • I have never met a guy who is a dumb guy.

  • - I mean, I have a degree in accounting for Christ's sake.

  • - You know, they expect us to be mean,

  • and when they realize, like, we're just normal people.

  • - You seem like a cool, down to earth dude.

  • - Yeah, we're not like that.

  • - Like, I'd go to the movies with you.

  • - I'd go to the movies with you too. What you wanna watch?

  • - I'm a normal person, I just like fighting

  • in an octagon in front of thousands of people, who wouldn't?

  • - [Bruce Buffer] Jessica "Evil" Eyeeeeeee.

  • - Every fight starts standing up.

  • When we hear that bell, we come out swinging.

  • (body slams into ground)

  • (crowd yells)

  • - The wonderful champ, Ronda Rousey, loves to do throws.

  • We're gonna do a counter to a throw, ok?

  • So as you try to throw me this way,

  • I'm gonna back drop you.

  • (laughter)

  • You see that? Did you catch that? I'll do it again.

  • This leg drops back down.

  • (body slams against ground)

  • So you use their momentum as soon as they

  • try to pull you over, you fall with them.

  • That's beautiful!

  • Look, and you're in dominant position right there

  • for judging.

  • I grab it here, I'm gonna step in...

  • (groans and laughter)

  • Now, once I've got you here, I'm gonna keep you there,

  • and I'm just gonna punch and strike.

  • (screams sarcastically)

  • This is called ground and pound.

  • - Ground and pound.

  • - Yeah. If I'm the one on the cage,

  • instead I'm gonna fish it up this way,

  • and bring his face back.

  • They make this bone, right here, for that.

  • Face lock.

  • So again-- - [Everyone] Face lock.

  • Face lock. Face lock.

  • (laughs)

  • - [Keith] Beautiful.

  • - [Zach] Perfect.

  • - But today Chuck and Jessica Eye

  • are going to officiate our matches.

  • - Well, I'm hoping we don't have to laugh at you too much.

  • - No matter who I fight, at best,

  • I'm 40 pounds lighter than them.

  • - Feel like, Eugene would laugh at me a lot.

  • - I would hold back against Ned's right pinky.

  • Everything else is fair game.

  • - Bam! One pop in the nose and he's gonna be like,

  • "whoa whoa whoa".

  • - If he's gonna put me in holds , I'm gonna fart.

  • I'm gonna fart my way out of the situation.

  • - I don't wanna hurt any of these people.

  • I love these guys. I don't want to hurt them

  • and I don't want them to hurt me.

  • I'm gonna be fighting Keith,

  • because we're both the gentlest.

  • - And, I'll fight Ned

  • 'cause we're both the most aggressive.

  • - I don't think that's gonna work for me.

  • He's way too big for you.

  • - Oh, so we have to go by weight class?