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  • - OK, so I hate my job.

  • I've always wanted to work for myself.

  • So I think it's time for me to quit.

  • I've drafted my resignation email right here.

  • All I've got to do is hit send.

  • Bro, I'm feeling it.

  • So I should do it, right?

  • Yes, just do it right now.

  • I am pumped up!

  • Hold up, let's not make any emotional decisions.

  • Let's, like, make a pros and cons list.

  • Come on, man that's no fun.

  • Well, I'm no fun.

  • Don't even entertain it playa.

  • It's a bad idea,

  • Super terrible.

  • You're gonna ruin your life.

  • Especially cause it's you making the decision.

  • Why are you two here?

  • Us? The dynamic duo? We're always here.

  • We don't want you here! Be gone!

  • (laughing)

  • You ain't getting rid of us that easily.

  • Any way... what would make the most sense is if you--

  • (laughing)

  • How can you trust this doofus?

  • Excuse me?

  • This clown, this fudge face here...

  • Who are you calling a fudge face?

  • He's an idiot.

  • He's dumb.

  • He's the guy who told you it made sense

  • to go to grad school and go into a bunch of debt

  • that you're still paying off today.

  • OK, yes, but--

  • You're never gonna have enough money.

  • Uh, what?

  • Just saying. If you leave your job to pursue your "dream,"

  • you're gonna end up going broke.

  • You're gonna lose everything.

  • And you're never gonna be able to recover.

  • You'll be a crack-head living in a cardboard box.

  • Your only friends will be the rats and the crack man.

  • But you hate this job, it's killing your soul.

  • Yeah, that's true too.

  • If you stay at this job,

  • you'll be miserable and hate your life

  • and never achieve anything that you wanted to.

  • You'll be a frustrated old man drinking a bottle

  • of Jim Beam every night,

  • just to wash away the regrets

  • of having lived a meaningless life.

  • Wait a second, are you now arguing for me leaving my job?

  • It would seem so.

  • So the opposite of what you were arguing 10 seconds ago.

  • That is correct.

  • Because no matter what you do, you're effed... in the A.

  • Let me highlight the "you" in that sentence.

  • Because if anyone else was doing this, they'd be fine.

  • But you, you're gonna screw it up... because you're you.

  • Hey, he's smart! He can do things!

  • OK, this is the guy here who made his whole office building

  • have to evacuate because he put aluminum foil

  • in the microwave.

  • It was a Chick-fil-A sandwich bag, OK?

  • I forgot that it's lined with foil.

  • It could have happened to anyone.

  • I agree, you can't do it, you're not ambitious.

  • That's why I broke up with you.

  • Why are you here?

  • I guess I'm just unforgettable.

  • Also, this is somewhat irrelevant

  • but no one's ever gonna love you ever again.

  • Okay.

  • You're gonna die alone.

  • Yeah, I get it, thank you.

  • Why didn't you ever go into law school like I did?

  • When I was your age, I already had a big house

  • and I was partner at a big law firm.

  • Dad?!

  • Dude, we gotta just do it.

  • Don't think! Just go brain dead and do it.

  • OK, maybe not brain dead.

  • Don't listen to them.

  • Idiot, stupid, stupid idiot.

  • Don't do it.

  • You're never get to make it.

  • You're gonna regret this forever.

  • Check out this new guy I'm dating.

  • Yes, just do it.

  • Don't do it.

  • Could you help me set up my Netflix this week?

  • I can't figure it out.

  • Do not send that email.

  • Do it.

  • If you send that email, your life is over.

  • Doneski.

  • (email send whoosh sound)

  • You mad man.

  • What have you done?

  • He did what he felt was right.

  • He did what was smart.

  • OK, well that was fun.

  • Let us know the next time you're making a big decision.

  • Yeah I--I won't.

  • OK, cool! See you then.

  • (laughing)

  • Don't you feel better now?

  • Yeah, I do.

  • If things go wrong, you can figure it out.

  • That's right.

  • Yeah...

  • Just like Biden's already figured out

  • how to ruin the country!

  • OK.

  • (smooth jazz music)

- OK, so I hate my job.

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Overthinking be like...

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    Minnie に公開 2021 年 02 月 08 日
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