Placeholder Image

字幕表 動画を再生する

  • Back in 2008 when we lived in Korea

  • we first started uploading videos to YouTube that were tutorials on how to do stuff in your life

  • Like how to throw out your garbage

  • or how to load up your subway card

  • or how to use your Korean washing machine

  • But now that we've been living in Japan, it's time for us to do a video in the spirit of how we started

  • Gonna give you a tutorial on how to wash your butt with Japanese toilets

  • [fart soundtrack]

  • Oh, I'm sorry

  • Were we in the middle of a - let me just put this back in my anime corner

  • Or my manga corner?

  • Or as everyone on the street calls it

  • maynga

  • Allow me to introduce you to my washlet, which came with the house

  • we didn't upgrade

  • this is like, kind of like a medium car of washlets I'd say [S: Yeah]

  • Not an economy, maybe like a sports or a compact, [S: I'd say this is like a, like a Saturn]

  • What up y'all, meemers needs you to [S: Evacuate the premises] Immediately

  • Someone needs to just - [S: Meemers has his own business]

  • He needs to use the toilet

  • [fart soundtrack]

  • Before we discuss toilet functions, I wanna show you something amazingly cool

  • So, uhm

  • this is the toilet paper station in Japan

  • That's literally how you change it, you just take it and you

  • pull it out, of these amazing little

  • flippity-flap dooda's

  • So you just take it and it goes, oh it's in now and you just let go and close it

  • Why am I -

  • So the basic features that you need to know are this spray function

  • 'oshiri' (おしり), which to me looks like a battle ax or those

  • like grappling hooks you see in spy movies. [S: No, it's]

  • [S]: Okay, it just, it looks like a flower, okay, so it's got a stem in the middle [M: A flower?]

  • [M: but there's no bloom-y part] and its got two petals

  • It's like a tulip, it looks like a tulip, you could say

  • [M]: Some people have grappling hooks

  • some people see flowers, whatever tickles your fancy

  • But there have been cases that we've gone to washrooms in Japan

  • that are kind of like sleek and metal looking so you do need to know the symbol

  • The most basic toilet comes with that one button that you push, 'oshiri', which is your butt spray

  • It's kind of like a nice way of saying

  • 'arse' or 'buttocks', maybe, like 'buttocks spray', I guess like what would be like the correct term for that?

  • [S: Uhmm I think it's your...]

  • 'burt' spray! b-u-r-

  • So some people are a little creeped out about the idea

  • that there is something that comes out and sprays water because they're like

  • ew, that's gross, it's gonna be icky, but it's not

  • because it stays inside of the toilet safely and covered and it has like a little

  • sanitization function that's happening [S: Like a little turtle head] like a little turtle head!

  • That's a really nice way to say it!

  • If you sit down on it, it, and you press the button, then it goes [eeurningama] and so if you're like

  • 'Oh, no, I don't want my butt sprayed', there's a stop button, square, you just push it

  • you just say stop

  • And then later on when you're finished with spraying

  • you can use a little bit of toilet paper just to kind of make sure that you don't have a damp butt

  • [S: There's a lot less toilet paper that you use as a result] Way less toilet paper!

  • and it's like super clean, it's, I love it

  • I love it~

  • Butt wait...

  • There's more!

  • Perhaps you had

  • extremely spicy indian food the day before

  • there is a button that you can press to adjust the pressure of the water

  • [S]: Do experiment with the different pressure settings, okay, no two buttholes are the same

  • Some like it really high intense spray and some like it really gentle, so fiddle around

  • find what works best for you and your butthole

  • and you will have a very pleasant cleaning experience

  • [M]: It's like a shower for your butthole

  • [S: Right] a nice warm shower

  • Our washlet even comes with a massage function, which I was very scared to press at first

  • Two little fists come out, I'm like, what is it going to be??

  • No, the water just kind of like pulses a little bit gently like a fountain

  • and you can also adjust the water temperature

  • Too icy cold or too super hot, and you might be like, 'Why would I need to adjust that?'

  • Well, let me tell you, bring it on back, Coco Curry level 10 curry spice burns

  • You're gonna want some cooling butt water

  • Butt wait...

  • There's more!

  • There's also a button that says bidet and it's meant to be specifically for women

  • The wand that's for spraying your butthole

  • will come out a little bit further and then it will spray other girly parts

  • I was a little bit confused about this at first because bidet to me was almost like

  • a universal term, like in Europe, they'll call - [S: Yeah] Right?

  • [S: In Europe. It's not just for women, it's for both] Right

  • Bidet just means kind of like unisex

  • It's nothing to do with it being male or female

  • it's simply just the location of the wand

  • Have you ever been up in the middle of the night in the winter

  • and you go to the washroom and you sit down and it's icy freezing cold

  • Not a worry here because both of our toilet seats in our house, upstairs and downstairs, are heatable

  • Yeah!

  • We have a button that can toggle it on and off, so in the winter time, we have the warmest cosiest seats

  • Never thought I'd be sitting on the ground, filming a video in my toilet, but here I am

  • Living the life, making my family proud

  • [funky dance music]

  • [toilet flushing sound]

  • I think it's very important to note that not all Japanese toilets are the same

  • While in North America a lot of the toilets are pretty functionally identical

  • in Japan they have lots of different brands

  • Recognisable ones like Panasonic, and even what they consider the Apple of toilets, Toto toilets.

  • [M: ᵀᵒᵗᵒᵒᵒ]

  • [M: We have been looking for a Toto sponsorship forever]

  • It is my dream video to be able to show you a ten thousand dollar toilet

  • [M: ᶦ ˡᵒᵛᵉ ᵗʰᵉ ᵀᵒᵗᵒ]

  • [M]: Hey ducky [S: Yes]

  • Do you remember the first time we ever saw our first gourmet Toto toilet

  • You rushed up to me and you said to me 'girl, you need to go to the washroom right now'

  • [S]: Now what - what I want to ask you is, for those of you watching, I have

  • favourite toilet experiences

  • Like I've had enough that I could actually rank [M: Rank them!] really positive ones

  • Do you have any toilet experiences which are like, 'Wow, that was a great time'?

  • I have that all the time in Japan

  • I can even rank my favourite ones

  • In Fukuoka, was my best toilet experience ever

  • [M Me too!] Right!?

  • You walk up to the toilet

  • and then as soon as you do it senses that you're coming and the seat lifts up

  • It's got like this ultraviolet light

  • that's all on the inside as well, that's disinfecting everything

  • You sit on it, it's almost kind of like it knows your body better than you know your body

  • Alright, it's like, it's like -

  • [M: But you know you're, you, you -]

  • a Latin lover

  • Simon is getting distracted in the weeds here

  • UV thing that he's talking about, is real, they have like

  • nanotech technology, where it coats the toilet bowl after each use

  • so prevents things from sticking

  • and it removes stains automatically when you walk away

  • It like closes it and just does its own thing - like

  • What?!

  • I think it's easier to think of Japanese

  • toilets as different kinds of cars

  • Like you could have the economy car that just has like the basic functionality

  • Or you can go like really luxury and high-end when it comes to your car

  • and you can spend a lot more and have a great experience

  • With that in mind, I'd like to say the North American toilets are like the horse-and-buggy

  • All right, we need some kind of industrial revolution to happen in North America

  • because y'all are living in medieval times

  • For real, the first week when you and I come back in Canada, we walk different

  • It's almost like those videos when you see, like you put socks on cat's feet and they walk weird

  • I don't feel right within the first week of using a Canadian toilet

  • [M: And what do we do to cope with it?]

  • We usually get wet wipes

  • [M: baby wipes] We bring baby wipes with us everywhere because

  • just wiping your butt with dry paper is not enough

  • Think of it this way, if you're walking by and a bird takes a dump on you

  • or you happen to walk past a hippo that does a

  • spinning tail thing and you get some poop around you

  • or if you're just around a human baby

  • you know, that if you get poop on you, you can't just wipe it away with dry paper

  • That's not enough

  • you're gonna run for the sink, you need water

  • Your butthole deserves the same treatment that your arm would if it gets covered in poop

  • Alright [M: ˢᵃʸ ᶦᵗ ˢᶦᵐᵒⁿ] your butthole

  • Is not a second-class citizen [M: ʸᵒᵘ'ʳᵉ ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ] of your body!

  • You treat that with the respect that it deserves!

  • And wash your butt the right way, with a Japanese toilet

  • Welcome

  • [loud Meemers meowing]

  • Welcome

  • [more meowing]

  • Welcome to our upstairs bathroom

  • almost identical to our downstairs bathroom

  • however we don't have the cool shelf with all of our books here

  • [M]: It's so small that in order for me to buy soap

  • I had to buy that magnetic suction cup thingy, and you shove your soap into it

  • [S]: I can literally touch both walls with my elbows, very very easily [M: Very tight]

  • Oh hello

  • Do you want to be in this video too? Come on in!

  • You want scritches? Alright, come here you're a part of the video now

  • [Meemers: No, alright, well]

  • A very interesting fact for you to note is that

  • even though these toilet seats aren't on every single Japanese toilet

  • they're still on majority of them

  • 81% of toilets as of 2016 have these little washlet systems on them

  • [M: In Japan that is] In Japan, that's correct

  • I just got very distracted by my

  • [M: Adorable cat] cute cat licking my face

  • Okay, come on, I'm trying to - I'm trying to put food on the table here

  • So these washlets are very common

  • However, you will notice that in Japan

  • a lot of the toilets have outlets right beside them

  • because these washers operate on electricity, so, some countries

  • I think there are some rules in which you can't have an outlet that close to the toilet

  • so I'm not sure if this is as easily translatable elsewhere

  • But in Japan if you buy a toilet

  • you'll probably see a socket, and not in many other countries

  • Why are you standing?

  • [Meemers: I just wanna be a part of the video]

  • What?

  • You're a cat, on all fours please

  • The one thing that Japanese toilets haven't solved yet

  • The witch's kiss

  • and if you know, you know

  • [M: ...I don't know]

  • Well, then it's not a problem that bothers you is it

  • I can't, he's too cute

  • Go away

  • Is that our fat cat [Meemers: Excuse me, pardon me]

  • squeezing his way through our tripod [Meemers: If you could just get out of the way mum] with your jelly belly -

  • There's one function in Japanese toilets that I actually don't agree with

  • There's a button that you can push that will play a sound

  • that will mask the fart sounds that you make as you're letting them rip

  • I find this completely unnecessary

  • [M]: Wow I am baffled with your commentary on this

  • [S: Well think about it this way- ] I absolutely love it

  • The flushing water sounds, the rushing meadow sounds

  • [S]: When you go to an opera and you sit down you expect to hear opera

  • When you go to a toilet, you should expect to hear some shit

  • You don't have to cover that up.

  • [M]: Yeah, I just don't wanna hear it

  • It's not that complicated, I don't wanna hear it.

  • If everyone -

  • [S]: If you had the choice of listening to opera everywhere you go, then why not?

  • That sound that you're talking about, was I think invented by Toto

  • They made, like, a button that was called like the princess sound

  • and it had different kinds of sounds that would help cover up noises, because they found that

  • women in Japan were flushing the toilet up to two times

  • in order to cover up the sounds

  • Which I did totally the same

  • Please let me know in the comment section if you've ever been like, 'isn't gonna be a good one'

  • And sometimes it's an automatic sensor that just goes off automatically

  • and it sounds just like flushing water

  • So nobody can tell the difference, because all the toilet stalls are going

  • [fwoosshhh]

  • They even have volume control

  • So if you've had an especially bad day, you're like cranking up the volume, you have like -

  • [S]: Pump the beats DJ!

  • I'm about to drop a hot one!

  • Thank you for watching our video on Japanese toilets

  • We contemplated how we were going end this

  • This is the best we've literally came up with [M: How do we end this?]

  • I hope that you feel encouraged now to embrace the beauty of Japanese toilets [M: Yeah]

  • Don't be afraid when you get on there